Hindsight With a Sixty Percent Chance of Aboutface
by K'sChoiceofAFI
Summary: Ever since Ivy had told me she was moving on, I had been feeling a little out of sorts. But it was just a saying; Ivy wasn't going anywhere. Except, it wasn't, and she was. So what the hell was I supposed to do? Rachel/Ivy
1. Chapter 1

**Title: **Hindsight, With a Sixty Percent Chance of About-face

**Pairing: **Rachel Morgan/Ivy Tamwood

**Rating: **PG-13

**Disclaimer: **I do not own these characters. Just having a little fun.

**Summary: **Ever since Ivy had told her she was going to move on, Rachel has been feeling a little out of sorts. But it was just a saying; Ivy wasn't going anywhere. Except, it wasn't, and she was.

**A/N**: This takes place after _Pale Demon_, so there are vague spoilers about the newest book in here.

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><p>The cool evening air wafted into the kitchen to chill my arms and I reached above the sink to close it. It was a November night and I was preoccupied with making spells for my latest run while Ivy ran over I.S. reports at her table. We had learned over two years ago that the best way to keep me alive was if we didn't mix scents too much. We had separate rooms, bathrooms, and when we inhabited the same space, the table was hers, and the rest of the kitchen mine. It didn't much make difference in the beginning because she had still gone for my jugular more times than I cared to admit but we had gotten better since then. Now we could eat dinner together at the table when the mood struck, and hug—again, when the mood struck. It was nice, and it was made a lot easier since Ivy had moved on. She had been in love with me for over a year, but I couldn't find it in me to return her affections the way she had wanted me to at the time. I had never been with a woman before. And though Ivy was unbelievably beautiful and sexy, I hadn't felt anything for her other than an appreciation for her beauty. About five months ago she had told me she was moving on and gave me what she had aptly described as a "hell of a goodbye kiss" that I still think of from time to time.<p>

I took a deep breath, calming my suddenly racing heart because I knew Ivy could smell the increase in blood pressure. We were supposed to be working on this case and the last thing either of us needed was me enticing her with something we ultimately both wanted, but couldn't find a way to maneuver around without having to change too much about ourselves. Ivy wanted to bite me, and I wanted the bond between us that came with a blood balance. But at the time we had discussed and tried it, she had wanted my body as well and I wasn't willing to give her that part of me. We had tried it and failed and the stipulations she had put on me was that if we were to try it again, I would either have to hurt her to get her to back off if she lost control of herself, or I would have to give her the love she needed to keep herself in control.

I wasn't willing to do either and, well, here we were. But it wasn't all bad. It wasn't bad at all, actually, because even though Ivy had moved on, our lives were still largely the same. I still loved her and relished in the fact that, even if only as a friend, she still loved me as well.

"Okay, what are you thinking about?" Ivy asked me, exasperation shown clearly in her tone.

Wincing at the tone of her voice, I turned around slowly. I smoothed back my unruly red hair subconsciously as I looked at her, sleek in tight leather pants and an equally tight black tank top that showed off her midriff. She was reclined back in her chair lazily like a big cat, stretching after a meal. Her hair had grown back out and tumbled down her shoulders and back alluringly to frame her slender face. I couldn't tell from here, but from years of living with her and even longer just _knowing_ her, I was sure her eyes were nearing pitch black by now. "What do you mean?" I asked with a frown, trying for aloof.

"Your scent is all over the place. It's driving me crazy," she drawled as she stretched. Her shirt rose even more and my eyes automatically fell to the hint of her bellybutton ring peeking out from under the shirt. When I looked back up, she was staring at me, a subtle warning of _don't go there_ etched onto her features with the firm purse of her lips.

I nodded, and the conversation dropped right then and there as I turned back to my spell pots.

Some things didn't change. One of the things that never changed was that Ivy always did weird things to me that I didn't understand. When my heart used to race, it was because I was scared of her. But somewhere along the line my heart stopped racing with fear, and started racing with adrenaline and something else I couldn't pinpoint. Either way, it set off Ivy's instincts which would ultimately have her at my jugular again if we both weren't careful. Every once in a while I would react weirdly to her and her pheromones and she would send me a warning that things wouldn't end well if I didn't get a handle on myself.

With that in mind, I threw myself into my work again, flipping through mountains of demon text for what I needed.

"This case is going to be a doozy," Ivy muttered as she went back to her own work. Any minute now she was going to break out her markers and _really_ start planning. "How long do you think this'll take?"

I huffed out a laugh at the question. Runs were always complicated, especially when I was involved. Ivy always did her runs rather smoothly and efficiently.

Stupid, capable vampire.

I, on the other hand, well…I wasn't very good at planning. And I was a _little_ impulsive at times, so runs got rather complicated from time to time, but I always finished what I started with minimal lives lost.

"Two, three weeks?" I tossed over my shoulder.

She chuckled over the sound of her papers stacking. "With you involved? Two or three _months_."

Her laughter continued and a new, quiet laughter, sounding like wind chimes reached my ears. I scowled. It was Jenks. "Ivy, don't you know by now that anything involving Rach here will get us killed twice as fast?" He cajoled again and I swatted him away from my face as dust shrouded my vision.

"Get bent, Jenks," I muttered.

The door rumbled with a knock and a symphony of chatting pixies rose along the ceiling. My teeth clenched as Jenks's children wreaked havoc on my eardrums. He shot me an apologetic look before he rose to calm them all down.

"I'll get it!" he hollered over them to stop their chatter. A collective, "Aww," resounded as they dejectedly returned to whatever corners of the house they were playing in.

I turned to find Ivy's table neat once again. Instead of four piles of papers, they were all stacked into one—neat, of course—pile beside the computer. I sighed quietly. That probably meant Glenn was here, which would explain why she had been stacking papers earlier.

Glenn was helping us on the case. He was an officer and former Ivy-lover. He had come over for the first time in months two weeks ago in which Ivy proceeded to flirt until her heart was content, pumping out vampire pheromones at an alarming rate that wasn't only affecting Glenn, but me as well. Eventually, I just had to leave because I couldn't stand it anymore. Jenks had teased me and said I was jealous. I had adamantly denied it, but Glenn had been over a few other times since then, and each time it made me uneasy. And I couldn't help but keep wondering if it made me uneasy because they were happy, and it could have been me.

"Hey, hey!" Glenn's voice, deep and booming, came calling through the church.

I watched as Ivy immediately responded to it, sliding smoothly from her seat into a standing position. She reached up and wrapped her arms around Glenn's neck. Then she chuckled darkly before applying a hint more pressure until he was gasping and grasping at her sides. "Trying to choke me?" he teased.

Their relationship was a weird power play that I didn't understand. Well, from Glenn's position, I couldn't understand. Ivy thrived on power play—she thrived on a lover who was more powerful than her. She was a living vampire and, thus, extremely strong to the general population. She could bench press more than either I or Glenn could even dream of, so physically, hardly any non-vamps would be able to overpower her. She looked for mental and emotional dominance in a partner, something that I had shockingly come to learn that I possessed. Had I not, Ivy would have killed me, spiraled into her own emotional depression due to Piscary without my help, or moved on by now. Glenn was a pretty powerful man, I had to admit. Nothing but prior military training could make a man stand as erect as he did, just a shade taller than Ivy's five-eleven stature, whereas I stood two inches shorter than her, typical height for a witch. He provided some form of challenge that I couldn't see. One that Ivy had toyed with, got bored with, seeing as she dumped him, but for some reasons—probably idle boredom—wanted to pick up again.

"Hey, Rachel," Glenn greeted as Ivy finally unwound her strong arms from around his vulnerable neck. He walked into the kitchen and leaned against the doorway.

I smiled over at him. "Got any good news for me?" I asked hopefully.

He sighed, adjusting his broad shoulders in his tight t-shirt with a shrug. "You know how the precinct is."

"Outdated?" Ivy hedged from over at the table. She was a ballbuster at heart.

Glenn scoffed, tilted his head towards me in greeting and lumbered back over to the table. "We can't all have color coded schematics like you, Ivy."

"You could try." Her gaze slid over him. Then her lips pulled upwards into a smile until small, sharp fangs glistened from the light. I shivered. "Then again, I am one of a kind."

Glenn pulled up a chair to sit on. He leaned over towards her. "That you are," he said.

I puffed out a frustrated breath and turned back to my spell pots.

They were at it. Again. And it was killing me inside because Ivy was already starting to pump out pheromones at an alarming rate to catch Glenn in her web.

As if he wasn't already a caught fish.

Or insect. Whatever. I couldn't even think right now. It was starting to smell amazing in here, like spice and danger and it was shooting straight to my groin.

I breathed in deeply, turning the page in my spell book and narrowing my eyes in determination to focus on this and not the way Ivy's laugh sounded like grey silk that I wanted to wrap myself in.

From above me, Jenks snickered and I pushed an errant lock of red hair from my eye to glare up at him.

"Jealous?" he asked.

"_No_," I instantly replied with, though my answer was getting less and less forceful every time he asked me. After all, it had been non-stop for two weeks now—Glenn was over every few days. He and Ivy would either leave or go to her room, then I wouldn't see her for hours and when I did, her eyes would be a healthy, deep brown, her swagger more relaxed as she walked. She would be sated, completely so, and every time I would see Glenn again there wouldn't be a mark on him. Which always led me to wonder just _where_ she was biting him, which then made me—

"I'm not jealous," I reiterated for good measure.

"Please," he scoffed. "You're as bitter as Tink's tampons."

I grimaced at the imagery, but otherwise ignored him and continued with what I was doing. I needed…I needed—"Herbs," I whispered to myself. "I need herbs."

Ivy's head sprouted up from where she and Glenn had been huddled together in a mix of pheromones that had crept over towards me. The scar on my neck, _her_ scar pulsed when I turned to find her black eyes watching me. "What do you need from the store?" she asked softly, though she had already heard me. "I can get it for you."

"No, I've got it," I insisted as I breezed past the two of them and out of the kitchen. I could tell Ivy knew something was wrong. I just hoped she was too preoccupied with Glenn to follow me into my room.

My throat clogged with emotion as I fought with my jacket to put it on. Jenks was right. And perhaps that was what bothered me most of all. I was jealous of the fact that Glenn got to have Ivy. I was jealous of the fact that after numerous failed trials with _me_, _he_ got to reap the benefits of Ivy's newfound control on bloodletting.

I shook away my thoughts, not even sure what any of this meant. But it didn't matter. Ivy had moved on and, more importantly, she had specifically asked me to let her go. Anything I was to say or do now would only anger her, probably.

I walked out of my room in quick strides, leaving the kitchen in my wake as I headed for the door. As soon as I reached the hallway, I heard Ivy behind me. My heart thumped loudly in anxiety. She had silently followed me the entire way, but made her footsteps known as she neared in an attempt to not frighten me.

"Are you okay?" she asked from behind me.

I turned around to find concern knitting her eyebrows together and pulling her lips downward into a frown. It still amazed me that someone so powerful could care for someone like me so much. And after all the ways I had screwed her over in the past almost three years, it astounded me that she _still_ cared. "I'm fine," I replied as breezily as I could with a smile on my face. "I just need some herbs to finish my spell."

She shifted her weight nervously until her left hip cocked out and her arms crossed over her middle, making her look slim yet in control. "Are you sure you don't want me to go out for you? It's probably dangerous for you to be out by yourself considering our newest run."

"Ivy, I'm fine," I assured. She didn't move an inch and I sighed before loudly calling for Jenks. He fluttered around us, dusting golden sparkles in his excitement to be leaving the house.

Ivy's eyes flicked from Jenks to me as her lips twisted in thought. "Okay," she drawled speculatively. "But call me if you need anything."

"I will." I turned to the door, but she grabbed my arm and spun me back around.

She towered over me by about two inches with eyes pitch black in anxiety and dark hair framing her face. She was achingly beautiful, and I marveled at the fact that two years ago this sight would have scared me. But now, it made my breath hitch as lean arms that belied Ivy's strength wrapped around me. She rested her head beside mine on my shoulder with a sigh. "I just want you to be careful," she told me.

Her voice sounded chastising and I couldn't help but smile at the fact that she always seemed to seamlessly slip into different roles—from a friend, to my mother, to…possibly something more. "I will be, Ivy. It's just the store."

She laughed humorlessly. "It's never _just_ anything with you, Rachel," she breathed. The warm breath of her sentence fanned out along my neck and I shivered in her arms as my scar began to tingle.

Ivy abruptly pulled back, grimacing almost apologetically before giving me a small wave. She walked back into the church and I opened the door and stepped outside with a sigh.

"You really stepped in it this time, Rach," Jenks told me.

I smiled wryly. "Yeah, well, wouldn't be me if I didn't, right?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Title: **Hindsight, With a Sixty Percent Chance of About-face

**Pairing: **Rachel Morgan/Ivy Tamwood

**Rating: **PG-13

**Disclaimer: **I do not own these characters. Just having a little fun.

**Summary: **Ever since Ivy had told her she was going to move on, Rachel has been feeling a little out of sorts. But it was just a saying; Ivy wasn't going anywhere. Except, it wasn't, and she was.

**A/N: **Thank you all for your reviews!

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><p>Ivy hadn't been home all day.<p>

I tried not to think about it as I prepared a dinner for one, but I couldn't help it. I turned to stare morosely at the lonely table several feet away. She wasn't there like she normally was and the inconsistency of her presence over the last two weeks was starting to get to me. I felt like such a _girl_ instead of the twenty-something—I was a lot closer to thirty than I cared to admit—adult I was, but I had never had a close friend before Ivy. She was my best friend, my partner of two years in this business we ran together and…I missed her.

I scowled at my own melodramatics and turned back to my pot to stir its contents before the noodles stuck to the bottom. It had only been two weeks, but if this was how the next two months, two years were going to be…

A familiar flutter of wings saved me from my own thoughts as Jenks settled in front of me. "Hey," I muttered distractedly. Leaning forward, I turned off the stove and grabbed the handles of the pot to carry to the sink.

Jenks eyed me curiously. "Have you seen Ivy?"

My shoulders tensed at the question as I poured excess water out of the pot. "No," I grumbled. "Not since I got back from the store yesterday."

When I had arrived from the store yesterday, Ivy had met me at the doorstep with anxious jet black eyes. She had probably heard my car rumbling down the street. She had asked me if I was alright as her eyes scanned down my body in silent critique.

The problem—well, not really a _problem_, more of a _situation_—was that I was technically a demon. Born a witch, but because of questionable experimental treatments to cure my Rosewood Syndrome when I was a child, my blood now kindled more demon magic than witch. The coven had made me declare myself a demon or they were going to kill me for being the shunned black witch I had once identified as.

Long story short, I was, for all intents and purposes, a new breed of demon who could permanently walk this side of the leylines.

So, as anyone could imagine, the general population who knew didn't care for me too much. Which was why I was easy pickings for the I.S. to frame for the murder of witches that had been going on lately, if I didn't help them 'solve' the case, that is.

All of this, including a bracelet on my wrist that dimmed the majority of my magic, combined to worry the living vampire out of Ivy whenever I left the house. But I wasn't going to let a little framing get me down. Plus, I had a bodyguard, Wayde, a were who was annoying yet capable.

Jenks continued to flutter nearby as I grabbed my bowl of steaming pasta and sat down.

"Rach, what the hell are you doing?" he asked frantically, wings clattering in indignation.

I couldn't be bothered with his outrage when the scent of incense began wrapping me up in its soothing warmth. "What?"

"Tink's panties, you're in Ivy's chair!" he exclaimed.

I blinked in confusion, then looked around to see that I really _was_ in Ivy's chair. That was why I was beginning to feel a little calmer; I could still smell her scent on it.

"You know you're not supposed to mix scents, Rach," Jenks warned. Stupid, overbearing pixy. "Get out of her chair!"

"Quit yelling at me!" I forked some pasta and drew it into my mouth as I contemplated this situation.

I do that now. Sometimes.

I wasn't going to move, though. I missed my friend, damn it, and if I had to settle for a chair that smelled just like her, then that was what I was going to do.

Ugh, what was I a dog or something? Content to have my master's scent until she returned? I grimaced at the thought and, after a few more seconds, stood from the chair. I wasn't _that_ pathetic.

My booted feet thudded against the wooden floor a little louder than normal in annoyance at the sound of Jenks following me into the living room. I settled onto the couch that also smelled of Ivy and it disgruntled me even further. Ignoring Jenks, I grabbed the remote from the couch and flicked the TV on.

It was already on the news. Of course it was, Ivy was the last one to watch it. There was a brief, very brief cover of the murders of witches that had been happening lately before the story was completely skipped over. The I.S. was trying to keep a lid on the situation but now that the FIB was involved it was a little harder to contain. They technically _had_ to alert the masses in some shape or form and a little blip about it in the news was probably all the coverage it was going to get.

Jenks settled down on the arm of the chair to preserve his energy. But also because he probably assumed whatever he had to discuss with me was going to be a long conversation. "What's going on with you?"

"What are you talking out?" I mumbled very lady-like around a forkful of pasta as the news anchorman covered a story of a cat being stuck in a tree. See? Inderlanders had normal news stories, too, sometimes.

"You've been acting weird since Ivy and Glenn started getting busy," he needled in a way he knew would get a reaction from me.

I didn't respond, though. Jenks was fishing for some information and I wasn't going to give it to him. Maybe I just needed to go on a date or something, get me out of this funk.

Beside me, Jenks dusted out golden sparkles that alerted me to the fact that he was enjoying this. "I think you're jealous."

I turned to him, brow furrowing at the amused smirk on his small features. "I'm _not_ jealous," I gritted out. "Being jealous would imply that I want Ivy."

"And you don't?"

"No," I answered quickly without thinking. After a few quiet seconds, I amended with, "I mean, I guess I miss her company. When she's single, she's around more, you know?" Not to mention the fact that since she had moved on she had apparently sprouted wings and just _flew_ as far away from me, a walking source of constant sexual frustration for her, as possible. I turned away from Jenks at the sight of what was beginning to look like genuine care in his eyes. "I just think we're growing apart, is all."

"Then grow back together," Jenks urged softly. "You big girl."

I rolled my eyes good-naturedly. It seemed that even when we were having a heart-to-heart, Jenks couldn't allow things to get _too_ sentimental and emotional. "What does that even mean?" I asked curiously.

He shrugged. "I don't know. What do you guys normally do to be close?"

That was just it. We never did anything. We never really bonded, and that was because of Ivy's reluctance to open up about her past which I fully respected. We were probably never going to gab on the couch after bingo like two old women, and that was okay. I didn't need that.

I wanted…

A small shiver rolled down my spine at the thought that sprang forth in my mind without preamble. The mental image of Ivy biting me, small, sharp fangs slipping inside of me and pulling from me until our auras combined slammed into my brain and I squirmed in my seat. I bolted upright in surprise and began swiftly walking away. "I'll see you later, Jenks," I tossed over my shoulder.

"You okay, Rach?" he asked, following behind me before we approached the threshold to my room.

"I'm fine." I gave him a small smile as I white knuckled the doorknob in my grip. "I'm just tired, okay? I'm gonna take a nap. See you later, Jenks."

He didn't look convinced, but didn't protest as I closed the door. I walked over to my bed and sat down on the edge with a sigh. I wasn't tired. I was floored by the fact that I wanted Ivy to bite me. But did I _really_ want it?

I admitted that she had seemed to gain quite a bit of control over the past several months. She had to if she was biting Glenn like I assumed she was. Her lacking control of being able to bite me without needing to have sex with me was the one thing that had kept us from finding a blood balance this entire time. And…_maybe_ if she was capable of controlling herself now…

My fingers flexed from where they held tightly to the edge of my mattress. I could feel by heart beating faster beneath my breast and I took a deep, calming breath, though I didn't need to. Ivy wasn't here. There wasn't a vampire around who I could be enticing right now with my reactions and I decided I could indulge a little. I could freely recall the memory of how good it felt to have Ivy inside of me before she lost control. The little, purring sounds she made as she lapped at my neck, teasing the both of us before she bit me, the way I moaned unabashedly, begging her to take as much as she needed as our auras chimed. I felt pressure build behind my eyes at the thought because it truly had been beautiful. I used to doubt Ivy when she described to me how beautiful sharing blood could be when feelings were involved, but she had showed me. And I had loved her all the more because of it.

I wanted it. I wanted that closeness after having spent two weeks growing apart, after having spent _months_ growing apart, because though Ivy was still here, she wasn't, really. Sure, she was still my friend, she still cared for me, but there was something lacking from our interactions and it was probably the unconditional love she once had for me.

The thought made me sullen as I slumped back onto my bed, wondering if Ivy had fallen out of love with me as I stared up at the ceiling. I shouldn't have been feeling this way. I was happy for her, really. After years of me not being able to give her what she wanted, she deserved to move on to someone who could. But I couldn't help but feel like I had been left behind, that Ivy had…left me, kind of.

I shook my head at myself. I had no right feeling that way. I had basically strung Ivy along for two years; she deserved whatever happiness came to her and then some. It was me who was going to have to deal with the adjustment of lacking the warm cushion of Ivy being _in_ love with me versus Ivy loving me.

A knock on the door jolted me out of my thoughts and I sprang up to stare at the flat plane with interest. "Come in."

The door opened and Ivy stood outside of my room, a curious frown on her face. My eyes widened in disbelief as she casually leaned against the doorframe as if she had been here all day. Geez, was I _really_ that deprived of her that her simply standing in my doorway was enough? "Hi," I said quietly.

"Hey," Ivy greeted. Her mouth twitched, teetering between a smile and a frown. "Is…something wrong?"

"No," I sighed, already knowing what she was referring to. "Why would you ask?"

Ivy glanced over her shoulder to reference the rest of the church as she flatly declared, "You've been in my chair."

I couldn't tell if she was upset, her voice a flat monotone, but her eyes were pinched in agitation, probably at my scent, and a part of me took solace in the fact that my smell still got under her skin. "Sorry," I said lamely, suddenly feeling guilty. She probably wasn't going to be able to work at the table for at least a day.

"And on the living room couch," Ivy continued. "Not that you _can't_ frequent the couch or anything. It was just..."

"Weird," I supplied for her when she trailed off. She folded her arms across her chest with a murmured agreement. "Sorry," I mumbled again, my gaze dropping. Maybe I was a dog waiting for its master after all because I was feeling properly chastened right now. And the feeling made me squirm with unease.

"It's…okay," Ivy said after a moment, sounding unsure of her own words. "Just make sure you dump your dishes next time."

Her tone had gone from flat to holding rich warmth with a hint of amusement, and I looked up to find her staring directly at me with a ghost of a smile on her face. Her beauty struck me as it always did as her svelte frame leaned against the door. I had the urge to have her in my room, but wasn't quite brave enough to ask. My gaze dropped to pick at my bed sheets absentmindedly as my mind churned over its newest chew toy: the fact that I wanted Ivy to bite me again, and the fact that it may be possible if she was biting Glenn. When I looked back up, Ivy was still there, eying me curiously. She probably still thought something was wrong with me considering I had inhabited all the places in the house her scent was the strongest besides her room while she was gone.

I puffed out a courageous breath and met her gaze unwaveringly. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Yeah," Ivy answered, her tone guarded.

I gestured to the door. "It's, uh, a little personal. You may want to close the door."

She didn't move for a moment and I could practically see the wheels turning in her head while she undoubtedly weighed the pros and cons of having this conversation with me that she knew nothing about. Finally, she walked into the room and closed the door silently behind her. She sauntered over to the bed, hips swaying seductively in a way that reminded me it was after sunset. This was the time when Ivy unconsciously turned into sex on legs with slightly lidded eyes, a gentle purr to her voice, and hips that swayed dangerously—it was a completely involuntary reflex that all vampires had in order to entice prey after dark.

As if they needed anymore help in _that_ area.

Ivy sat beside me with a noticeable space between us that made me frown. I looked up into her cinnamon colored eyes and plastered on a small smile. "How are things going with Glenn?"

If she wasn't suspicious of me before, she was definitely suspicious of me now as her brow furrowed at the question. "What do you mean?" she asked slowly.

I shrugged helplessly because I really didn't know what I was getting at either. But it was a good, friendly thing to do, checking to see how a friend was fairing with their significant other. "I was just wondering if he was treating you right, and stuff…" I trailed off, feeling completely mortified. What in hell was I even _saying_?

Ivy must have understood something in my sentence that I didn't because her lips slowly curved into a smile. Her fangs presented themselves to me and I stifled a shiver. "It's going well," she answered simply.

"Really?" I couldn't help but ask. I immediately felt like kind of a jerk afterwards because Glenn was a great guy. It wasn't really surprising that he was treating Ivy well. I was just acting weirdly for some reason. "He treats you well, then?"

"Very," Ivy answered, her voice a low purr that alluded to something that made my stomach clench.

I swallowed thickly. "Can I ask you another question?" I asked, though I probably shouldn't have.

"Go ahead," Ivy allowed.

"Do you…bite him?" I was suddenly feeling prudish about broaching the subject for some reason. But at even the mere thought of biting, my scar seemed to pulse without the aid of pheromones. My gaze dropped from Ivy, both from embarrassment at the question I asked and the way thoughts of her biting me made me feel. I inhaled a deep breath, and when Ivy did the same, I knew she caught my scent.

"Sometimes," she rasped. Then she shifted uncomfortably and cleared her throat. "If he feels that I'm in control and it's safe enough, then we'll give it a go."

I frowned. I didn't like the idea of Ivy only getting blood on Glenn's terms. Granted, I could understand where Glenn was coming from. I was a witch, _demon_, and in the beginning thoughts of Ivy thirsting after my blood had scared the living hell out of me. I couldn't imagine what a human like Glenn went through on a daily basis while dating a vampire. Adding blood play into the mix had high chances of creating a discontented, unsatisfied vampire if done incorrectly. And from years of dealing with Ivy, I had learned that there were a _lot_ of things that could be done incorrectly when it came to a vampire. Hell, I had almost done them all.

But still, I didn't like the thought of Ivy not getting a blood balance when she needed it. Because it wasn't just about the blood to her when it came to people she cared about. It was about her need to connect with another individual; I had learned that. I didn't like that her needs weren't being met one hundred percent of the time.

Ivy glanced around the room in suspicion before turning back to me. Her lips pursed as her eyes flicked all across my face. "What is this about?" she asked evenly.

"What is what about?" I blurted out as a first line of defense. I noticed the ring of brown in her eyes slowly getting thinner, and something told me she was catching on. Either that or my scent was starting to get to her from her prolonged stay in my room.

"Why are you asking me these questions? You're fishing."

"For what?"

Her expression hardened. She was done playing games. "I don't _know_," she replied tightly. "Tell me."

She didn't like not knowing and that fact that she didn't know whatever I was up to—really, I kind of didn't know either—was starting to piss her off. "Ivy," I started quietly. My heart began to thunder in my chest, both in protest and excitement.

"What?" she replied shortly.

I licked my lips, gathering enough courage to not back down. "I want a blood balance with you."

To my surprise, _she_ didn't look surprised at all. She did, however, begin to look more and more pissed as the seconds wore on. "_What_?" she asked suddenly. "Why?"

"I miss you," I said quietly, hating the vulnerability that was starting to creep up on me. I didn't want her to be upset; I just wanted _her_.

Her lips pressed firmly together as she mulled over my statement. The brown in her eyes was rapidly being swallowed up by blackness and even though I knew she was pissed, I couldn't help the thrilled shiver that shot down my spine. "No," Ivy replied succinctly.

My stomach dropped at the denial. "Wha—"

"You don't miss _me_," she emphasized. "You just miss attention."

"No, Ivy, I—"

"I get it," she replied sharply. "You've been single for a few months and now it's starting to get to you." Her head tilted as she met my gaze with sullen eyes. "But you can't play this game," she said quietly, a pleading note creeping into her voice. "I told you to—"

"Let you go," I finished softly, swallowing a lump of emotion down my throat as memories of that day, that kiss came to mind. It had felt like someone had ripped my heart out. I had honestly thought Ivy was going to drop out of my life forever. But she hadn't and I was grateful, but damn it, I still missed her. "I know and I did," I continued, almost whining, because I _had_ let her go like she asked. "But I feel like it-it's not the same."

"It's not supposed to be the same," Ivy told me in exasperation. "I moved on, Rachel—"

"And I'm happy for you," I cut in sincerely. "I want you to be happy, and if Glenn makes you happy, then I'm happy. But I just miss…us," I whispered.

Ivy choked out a watery laugh, looking cross with me, yet touched at the same time. "Us?" she whispered.

I nodded hurriedly, thinking this was my chance. "We're friends, Ivy. And I love you. And lately, I just feel like we've been drifting apart. And I thought that a blood balance—a time once a month, or once every few weeks—whenever you need it—would help us be closer," I finished quietly, feeling grossly sappy but it was the truth.

She touched a hand to her face as if to wipe a tear that she had yet to cry. A large, frustrated sigh was pushed past her lips. She was irritated with the push-pull relationship we had always had, and I was ready to prove to her that she could trust me with this one. "I thought it would work this time," I told her. "I don't have to hurt you because you're in control. You would have to be in order to bite Glenn."

There was an imperceptible nod from her at the last of my statement that gave me hope. "And you're with Glenn now, so the more…amorous side of your needs get sated all the time."

"Why do you want this?" Ivy asked abruptly, her voice a dangerous jazz song on a stormy night.

"I want us to be closer," I responded again, knowing she was assessing whether or not I actually wanted _this_, or simple attention like a drunken high school girl at a party. "I want to fulfill your needs whenever you have them," I whispered, not meaning to take a cheap dig at Glenn, but surprising myself with how true that statement was. "And I need this, too." It may have been impulsive; it was my nature and I couldn't help it, but I was determined not to let Ivy down this time.

Her eyes closed at the amount of emotion in my voice and she took a deep breath. She could sense my need for her, how much I wanted this; I could tell by the predatory look in her half lidded black eyes when she opened them to stare directly at me.

Then suddenly, with vampire quickness, she stood from the bed. "I'll think about it," she murmured as she stared down at me.

My jaw dropped completely through the floor. She'd _think_ about it? As in _not_ slake her blood-thirst for me right now in my room as I was giving it to her. She was going to _think_ about it instead. She really _did_ have control over herself now, and it made me a little disgruntled.

If the tiny, barely there smile on her face was any indication, she knew exactly where my thoughts were. "I would have to talk it over with Glenn," she elaborated. "_If_ I decide to do this, that is."

I could do little more than stare up at her helplessly and it pissed me off. Ivy was holding all the cards. And if she really wanted to move on as much as she had been yammering about, then…she may not want this with me after all. "Okay," I half whispered, half grumbled.

The next thing I knew, Ivy was by my side on the bed. She cupped the side of my face gently and made me face her. When I looked into her eyes, I saw the same love and care for me that had been there this whole time shining through at me. "I want this, too, Rachel," she told me softly. A shudder ran through her body as she rasped, "I've wanted this for years. I just have to think of whether or not I should do this, and what it would mean for me and Glenn, okay?"

I felt a little better knowing she wanted this, too, and I nodded at her. I just wasn't used to not getting my way. Especially with her.

Her thumb brushed over my cheek tenderly and I sighed at the contact. "Just give me a couple of days," she told me.

"Okay," I assured with a nod.

She gave me a small smile before standing up from the bed. I watched her saunter over to the door and leave without looking back. Then I flopped back onto my bed with a sigh. Instant gratification was so not on the menu, it seemed.

This must have been what Ivy had felt like for two years.


	3. Chapter 3

**Title: **Hindsight, With a Sixty Percent Chance of About-face

**Pairing: **Rachel Morgan/Ivy Tamwood

**Rating: **PG-13

**Disclaimer: **I do not own these characters. Just having a little fun.

**Summary: **Ever since Ivy had told her she was going to move on, Rachel has been feeling a little out of sorts. But it was just a saying; Ivy wasn't going anywhere. Except, it wasn't, and she was.

* * *

><p>I felt like I was up to my ass in vampires. Between Ivy and Nina, the vampire who I was unwillingly forced to work my current run with, I was in a constant state of pheromone induced euphoria and if someone didn't put me out of my misery soon, I was going to be the equivalent of Jenks's cat: rubbing myself against any and everything.<p>

I sucked my teeth in annoyance as I stomped my way into the church. Working a crime scene with Nina was starting to get under my skin. The crazy vamp may as well have had two personalities—the badly dressed, young woman who she really was, and the master vamp who overtook her whenever he saw fit. He had had his eyes on Ivy weeks ago because of how strong and defiant she was, and to my surprise, Ivy hadn't taken the bait. Though for a couple of days or so, she had toyed with the idea. But she had grown so much stronger emotionally since Piscary had passed for good, and it made me proud that she had resisted the tempting control of an old, master vampire the way she did. Every once in a while though, she'd swing her ass a certain way when she knew Nina was watching. Which, well…

Kisten's pool table stood off to the side like a distant memory in the sanctuary as I passed through. I approached it slowly, noticing how the felt was still charred—I hadn't ever taken the time to fix it. Memories of my beginnings with Kisten rested heavy on my mind. He had been the safer version of Ivy, if anything. Both scarred by Piscary, yet Kisten had somehow come out of it more emotionally stable than Ivy had two years ago. I had thought that I would never be over him, yet as I stared down at the pool table that had yet to be refurbished, I realized that I was. I would always miss him, but I had moved on several times since his death without even noticing it. Heaving a deep breath, I brushed my fingers over the pool table once more and walked away.

My feet thudded loudly against the floor as I headed straight for the kitchen. It was my safe haven outside of my room. A place that I could come to and feel at peace around the familiar smells of charms and spells. Only, that smell was beginning to fade because my blood kindled less and less witch magic these days and it was proving frustrating to prick my finger and drip my blood, only to not be able to invoke a spell. Jenks had become a near causality from all the items I had been throwing around in fits of rage as Ivy and I worked hard on this case. Well, Ivy worked hard. I mostly screwed up most of the time and occasionally made some headway.

Things had been going…relatively well. Ivy had been around a lot more the past few days. But she hadn't mentioned my proposition for a blood balance once. She just kept walking around the house alluringly as if the offer of my blood _wasn't_ on the table. I expected her to say yes the next day and then we could start repairing our relationship, but noooo. All she had been doing the past few days was hanging out around the house. I had the sneaky suspicion that she was hunting me. Or at the very least, mixing our scents in an attempt at assessing whether or not she could handle actually biting me without losing control. Ivy always calculated risks. Which was great, I guess, but I had already assessed the situation my own way and I trusted her to take what she needed from me and keep me safe if I willingly gave it to her.

But she was doing it her way, and I was just going to have to deal with it.

Gathering my hair into a thick, tangled ponytail, I pulled off a hair tie from around my wrist and twisted it in my hair. Remembering the tattoo I had gotten a few days back, I touched a hand to the back of my neck. It still felt painful, but barely, a dull pulse that was present enough to notice but not uncomfortable.

"Trust me yet?" Wayde, my bodyguard, replied a little snidely out of nowhere as if my tattoo had conjured him up. It was a tattoo of the pack I was a part of. I was the alpha, go figure, and I hadn't been setting a good example for my pack—David. In a fit of rage after I had inadvertently told Wayde that I didn't really trust him completely with my life, Wayde forced me down to the tattoo parlor where I had gotten it. It was a dandelion with a moon behind it that was partly concealed, partly shown for everyone to know who I was.

I turned to find Wayde slumping against the doorframe with his arms folded, glaring at me. He had been determined to prove that he was capable of keeping me safe the past few days and I was admittedly beginning to trust him more. I didn't care for his little attitude right now though.

"Look, I already apologized for that," I replied a little tightly. "You do your job well, Wayde. Happy?"

He smirked at the no doubt miffed expression on my face and walked further into the kitchen. His lean muscles contorted as he walked and I had to admit he looked good. And I tilted my head to the side as I noticed how I oddly uninterested I was. He had even not so subtly extended a 'casual friendship' invitation of sorts to me, but I didn't do casual well. I was never really the no strings attached kind of person.

"What are you doing for the rest of the night?" he asked, coming to a stop in front of me.

I shrugged a shoulder, casting a glance to the two spell pots in the sink. The case was kind of at a standstill right now. At least on my end. Ivy and Glenn worked it out day and night…when they weren't working each other out. They mostly went over information that they had gone over several times for something new. For now I was waiting, admittedly a little fearfully, until we took action against HAPA. Until then, I was mostly working on things around the house that I had put off until now. Like refurbishing that pool table perhaps…

"Well, then you're hanging with me," Wayde asserted. "Seriously, Rachel, you're turning into an old maid. Staying in the house like some—"

"_Demon_?" I replied snidely. "I _am_ one. One who's being hunted by HAPA, so forgive me if I don't want to go out and paint the town red anymore."

"_Hello_?" he fired back with just as much attitude. His muscled arms unwound from being folded across his chest to hang like tree trunks at his side. His shoulders tensed like he was going to force me out of the house again and though I was exhausted, I could feel my body gearing up for another go.

Wayde sensed my change in mood and eased up a little.

From somewhere behind me, I could hear Jenks flying towards us, no doubt having heard the entire conversation. "No use in talking fun into this one over here," he told Wayde, hooking his thumb towards me. "She's been frustration central since Ivy blue balled her."

I could feel my face warm in embarrassment and swatted at Jenks in agitation. "She did not!" I yelled over Jenks's laughter.

Wayde's eyes widened as he looked from Jenks to me, trying to figure out which one of us to believe. "What's he going on about?" he asked suspiciously. "You and Ivy…?" He didn't look particularly surprised by the question he was asking and it only made me redden more.

"_No_," I insisted, leaving it at that. She and I...weren't in a relationship by any means, but trying for a blood balance was just as intimate and I was uncomfortable elaborating further on the situation.

His eyes narrowed at me for a moment then he looked over to Jenks. They shared some sort of smile with a secret behind it I wasn't privy to and, uncomfortable, I shifted under their scrutiny.

"So, you're not going out tonight?" Wayde asked again, looking over at me.

The faint sound of two sets of footsteps entering the sanctuary caught my attention and I shook my head, eyes shifting to the doorway to find Ivy and Glenn walking into the kitchen. "No thanks. I'm good," I murmured distractedly, eying Ivy. Her eyes were jet black, her posture a little rigid to the trained eye as she sauntered into the kitchen.

"Hey, Rachel," she greeted, her voice a husky drawl that wafted over my ears. I stifled a shiver as she walked over to the table and sat in her chair. Glenn grabbed a chair and dragged it beside her, waving at me with a tightlipped smile.

If it was possible, my embarrassment reached what I thought had been unreachable levels. He knew. I could tell by the slight grimace to his smile.

"How are you, Rachel?" he greeted just as warmly as ever.

"Hey, Ivy," Wayde said with quivering lips as if he had a secret.

What was this, everyone greet each other day?

Ivy looked over at him in acknowledgement, her eyelids heavy and alluring as she dragged her gaze over to me. She looked ravenous and I swallowed thickly at what may be coming my way soon as I stared back at her. My eyes slid over to Glenn as he looked at me strangely, head tiled and eyes squinted as if I was some difficult math equation that he couldn't figure out.

"I'm gonna go," Wayde cut in suddenly. I looked over to find him slowly backing out of the kitchen. "Maybe Bis needs some company."

I almost didn't want him to leave. If the way Glenn was looking at me was any indication, the next several minutes were going to be awkward.

No one said anything as Wayde walked out of the kitchen. I rubbed at the still slightly itchy skin beside my tattoo as I turned to Ivy and Glenn. "Making any headway on the case?" I asked in an attempt to start some conversation in the thickening silence. Ivy hadn't taken her eyes off me in the past two minutes and it was a little distracting. There weren't even any extra pheromones in the air yet, but I could still feel my pulse quicken at the familiar promise of her gaze.

"Rachel, could we talk?" she asked softly. For once, her eyes strayed for me to Jenks buzzing around nervously. "Alone."

"No way, Tamwood!" Jenks exclaimed, alighting in various colors to show his outrage. "Whatever you have to say, you say it in front of me!"

"Jenks," I sighed. "Not right now. This is private."

He fluttered downward until he was eye level with me. My eyes crossed at his close proximity and I halfheartedly swatted at him to get him to back up. Once my vision focused again, I saw him in front of me, hands on his hips and looking peeved. "What is this about?" he demanded.

"It's private," I reiterated testily. Ever since the church had technically become his, he had been acting a little high and mighty. "It's between me and Ivy…and Glenn."

His eyes pinched for a moment before some form of understanding dawned on him. Probably the wrong understanding, but if what he was thinking was going to get him out of my hair, then so be it. "Kinky witch," he muttered, gaining altitude and flying as far away from the kitchen as possible. He didn't like hearing about intimacy and Ivy and I had learned long ago that it was a sure fire way to get him off of our backs from time to time.

Once he was gone, there was only me, Ivy, and Glenn left in the kitchen. I crossed my arms over my middle as I stared at the two of them at the table.

"Don't be nervous, Rachel," Ivy told me.

"I'm not," I automatically replied. But I was and I knew she could tell. I sighed, wondering why Glenn was here.

As if reading my thoughts, Glenn stood from the chair and walked over to the other side of the table. He pulled out the other chair and gestured towards it. "Are you going to sit or leave us waiting the whole night?" he asked teasingly.

The warmth in his voice eased my tense shoulders somewhat. At least he didn't hate me, knowing that I wanted his girlfriend to bite me and all. I flashed him an awkward smile and walked over to the chair, sitting down. I folded my hands in my lap, waiting until Glenn situated himself. Ivy purposefully avoided eye contact now, gaining an air of professionalism as if this was a business transaction.

Was it?

Glenn cleared his throat, sliding a long arm along the back of Ivy's chair. I thought it possessive and Ivy must have, too, because she slowly removed it from around her, shooting Glenn a fang-filled smirk that made me shiver.

Glenn shook his head good-naturedly before turning towards me. "Ivy's told me that you want a blood balance."

My jaw dropped as I stared back at him, completely aghast.

"We both want it," Ivy spoke up, assuring me in one statement. I pushed out a rough breath, glaring mildly at her for not informing him that she wanted this as well.

But Glenn looked completely undeterred, as if Ivy wanting my blood didn't surprise him.

"Sorry. You both want it," he amended. Then he scratched the back of his head with a wry chuckle. "Honestly, when I first met you guys…I had already assumed you were sharing blood."

Ivy coughed into her fist, reddening a little as I pursed my lips and looked away. _Most_ people upon first assessment of Ivy and me assumed she and I shared _something_ or another. Whether our bodies or my blood, varied in opinion from person to person.

Glenn nudged Ivy, not used to seeing her embarrassed. It was indeed a rare emotion that she expressed, something that only I got to see or elicit in her and I was a bit proud of that.

"Anyway," Glenn continued. "Ivy had come to talk to me about it the day you asked her."

My gaze shot up at his statement. So she _had_ been just as eager as I was. I was sitting around here for days wondering if Ivy even gave a damn—and the very same day that I had asked her for a blood balance she had babbled about it to Glenn. I smiled.

He looked towards Ivy and she gestured for him to continue. "Umm, I told her I didn't mind if the two of you explored your friendship. Of course. But I have to—it's just that…"

He trailed off uncharacteristically in a way that piqued my interest. Glenn never got tongue-tied. His face reddened slightly and my brow furrowed as I looked towards Ivy.

She muttered something under her breath towards Glenn that suspiciously sounded like the word 'pussy' before she spoke up. "Essentially, Glenn wants to watch."

"_Excuse_ _me_?" I exclaimed.

"Hey!" Glenn protested, looking between Ivy and me frantically. "Not like _that_, Rachel, I promise."

"Then like what?" I continued, irate at the very idea.

He looked like his head was about to explode, so Ivy rubbed a gentle hand down his arm, her long pianist fingers stroking his triceps. "What I mean to say is that, well, the last couple of times Ivy and I have shared blood, we had…another person there."

"She already knows," Ivy told him in an attempt to ease his babbling. "I've got a better nose, but hers isn't so bad either."

_Oh_. Glenn meant Daryl, I realized with a small grimace.

_That_ had started up not too long ago. I had come home after getting my tattoo to find the house empty. Ivy hadn't come home until the next day, smelling like honey, gold, and Old Spice. Glenn and Daryl—the reason why Ivy just said that my nose wasn't so bad. They had had sex with a nymph, which wasn't surprising on a vamps end, but I was certainly surprised that Glenn had participated. Sometimes vampires engaged in threesomes in order to have a third party to make sure things didn't get out of hand when the bloodletting started.

"I trust Ivy," I said suddenly with conviction as I sat forward in my seat. If that was where Glenn was going with this, then he could shove it.

Ivy shrugged a shoulder helplessly, giving me a small smile. "I don't."

The wind was knocked out of me with her small declaration and I sat back in my seat, staring at her. "Why not?"

Ivy shifted uncomfortably in her seat. She crossed one toned thigh over the other, dragging my attention south towards the amount of her thighs I could see from around the table for a moment before I looked back up at her again. "Rachel, I've wanted this for years," she said quietly. "And I'm not just talking about since we've lived in this church."

My pulse quickened at the implication of her statement. She had wanted me since the days where we both worked at IS. Her need for me had always shaken me to my very foundation and this time was no different. My hand reached up on its own accord, touching my scar and I sighed softly at the way Ivy eyed me from under her eyelashes as she began to pump out pheromones.

Glenn shifted at Ivy's side, no doubt feeling the effects. "I'm not suggesting a threesome," he said, cutting through the haze of my desire to have Ivy biting me, holding me, being close to me again finally. "But Ivy isn't sure if she'll be completely up to it and wants me to spot her. Just this once."

I didn't particularly like this idea. This moment was supposed to be mine and Ivy's and I felt like Glenn was intruding on it. But still, for Ivy's comfort and, ultimately, my own safety, it was probably best if I consented to this.

I braced my hands on the table to give them something to do as the urge to reach out and touch Ivy became overwhelming. "Okay," I breathed out. "But just this once because this is weird."

Ivy smiled as Glenn chuckled. "Trust me, it's going to be even weirder from where I'll be sitting," he said.


	4. Chapter 4

**Title: **Hindsight, With a Sixty Percent Chance of About-face

**Pairing: **Rachel Morgan/Ivy Tamwood

**Rating: **PG-13

**Disclaimer: **I do not own these characters. Just having a little fun.

**Summary: **Ever since Ivy had told her she was going to move on, Rachel has been feeling a little out of sorts. But it was just a saying; Ivy wasn't going anywhere. Except, it wasn't, and she was.

* * *

><p>"Where are we going to do this?" I asked, trying to place as much bravado in my voice as possible. It was starting to dawn on me that this was really happening. My heart began to thunder harshly beneath by breast and I wondered if Ivy could hear it. I knew for a fact that she could smell it, the increase in my blood pressure and that it was wreaking havoc on her instincts by the way she would lean more and more forward in her seat every few seconds as if it was taking all of her self control to not lunge at me.<p>

She blinked once, slowly, before seemingly coming to her senses to say to me, "Your room. I can't have our mixed scents in mine."

I nodded in understanding. She may have claimed that she was over me, but after living with me for so long her instincts would always call out to her to claim me and having both of our scents in her room would only strengthen those natural urges. A shiver ran down my spine at the thought of Ivy throwing caution to the wind and finally taking me, _all_ of me and meeting me with all of her the way she wanted to, the way she had always threatened to when I would unknowingly push the boundaries of our friendship.

With that, I pushed away from the chair, trying to get away from Ivy and the weird thoughts I was having. But the knowledge that she would be biting me, slipping her fangs inside of me within the next five minutes caused a familiar clenching in my lower abdomen that unnerved me as the three of us walked down the hallway to my room. I couldn't hear Ivy's footsteps behind me and was hoping that she wasn't too far gone and vamped out to do this. I opened the door to my room and we all poured into it, Glenn closing the door behind him. Right in the center of my room, along my wall was my bed and my face flushed at the thought of Ivy and I doing this horizontally.

I turned to find Ivy glancing around my room in interest as Glenn shoved his hands in his pockets. He looked sure of himself, capable, and a part of me became nervous. He was here to ensure that Ivy wasn't going to get out of hand. Was she? Was this going to go wrong again? Was I going to screw up and was Ivy going to get fed up and vow to never try this again for real this time? Those questions weighed heavy in the furrow of my brow as I watched Glenn walk over to a lounge chair in the corner of my room. "Mind if I sit here?" he asked.

I folded my arms across my chest and leaned back on a nearby wall, keeping Ivy and Glenn in sight. "Go ahead," I said, breath little more than choked air flow as I churned over all the ways this could go wrong. Sure, Glenn was strong. But he wasn't as strong as Ivy and I had a bracelet on my wrist that dampened my magic, so if Ivy were to lose control…I'd be screwed.

But I found myself forcing down a thick swallow as I stared at Ivy's svelte frame dressed in an oversized gray sweater, black tights, and boots. She looked sexy and confident, standing in the middle of my room like she owned it. Her gaze landed heavily on my bed and a spike of warmth shot through me as she eyed it with more than a little interest.

Her head shot up immediately and she turned to look at me, her gaze dark and full of promise as she scented my sudden desire. She sauntered over to me with a cautious air about her. Still, her hips sashayed like someone who was excited that they were gonna get some. I watched her dark silky hair drape over her shoulders and wondered at how soft it was. I hadn't touched it in I didn't know how long. She stopped in front of me with black eyes that carried a sense of warmth that began to calm me. I also found a familiar heat in her dark gaze, heat that I hadn't seen in months and it surprised me how much I missed it. I missed Ivy wanting me, loving me. My eyes somewhat accusatorily slid over to Glenn. _Remember, you're happy for her_, I told myself. And I was happy for Glenn. He was a good guy. And Ivy…she was a great woman. It was just…

Ivy looked over her left shoulder to where Glenn was sitting in the corner of the room. She gave him a small smile then looked back over at me. "Don't be nervous," her soft voice told me. My eyes strayed from Glenn as well to find Ivy watching me intently. "It's just you and me."

"And Glenn," I added in an attempt at a weak joke. I could see him out of my peripheral and it was hard to get in the mood, sort of speak, with him there. I wondered if this was the male equivalent of not being able to get it up with an audience around.

Ivy smiled beautifully at me in a way that lit her whole face up. "Me and you, Rachel."

There was so much devotion in her eyes as she willed me to focus on her and not the fact that vampires had creepy customs of having someone watch what I would consider to be an intimate act. It was like Glenn was watching Ivy and I have sex. Not that I would—

I sighed and pushed the thought away from my mind as Ivy swayed closer. I could feel her body heat as she neared me and any tension that I had previously melted away like the cinnamon in her eyes. She placed a hand on my hip and I inhaled deeply, anticipating what was coming.

"You okay?" Ivy asked even as she dipped her head to rest against mine. She exhaled against my jawline and I trembled in her arms as they encircled my waist. I nodded against her and she chuckled, placing her lips against my ear to mumble, "Use your words, dear heart."

I whimpered at the term of endearment that slipped effortlessly from her lips. She rarely used it, but with the distance that was growing between us the past several months I had grown to miss hearing her call me that. "Yes," I whispered, clearing my throat to boldly declare, "I'm fine." I didn't want to seem uncomfortable or squeamish, nor did I want it to be so obvious how much Ivy affected me. But she knew. She took a deep breath, shuddering slightly against me and I knew she knew.

"Rachel, you had better want this," she groaned. "No more games."

"No more games," I promised. I mistakenly looked at Glenn then my eyes clamped shut. Damn it.

Ivy felt me tense immediately and pulled away to stare worriedly into my eyes. "What's wrong?"

My hands clenched, hanging awkwardly at my sides and I couldn't think of what to do with them. "Nothing," I mumbled, my gaze darting all over Ivy's face. She was so beautiful it almost hurt to think of all the things she had been through in her life. My hand rose on its own accord, smoothing a silky lock of onyx hair from Ivy's face. Her eyes fluttered at the contact and I smiled.

She leaned forward into my hand more as she stared into my eyes. "You give me this?" she asked softly.

The startling vulnerability in her voice whenever we ended up here always tugged at my heart. She looked so young and innocent and not at all like the late twenty-something, traumatized vampire she once was. She was Ivy. My Ivy and the thought caused my chest to expand as I nodded my head. "I give you this," I whispered. I took a deep breath. "I give both of us this."

I could see a smile lifting the corner of her lips as she lowered her head, nudging my chin upward with her nose and burying her face into my neck. It all of a sudden felt extremely warm as her pheromones began to seep into the air around us. My body began to tingle, goosebumps broke out along my skin and I found myself grasping at Ivy's shoulder as she nuzzled me. She stayed clear of my scar, _her_ scar as her nose brushed along my neck softly, scenting me, getting me acquainted with the fact that a vampire was at my jugular. Her motions were so slow and controlled that I slumped back against the wall with a sigh, Ivy taking a step closer and molding herself into me.

It was such a stark contrast to how she was almost a year ago when we had last tried this. Then again, this was only the beginning and I probably shouldn't be counting my chickens before they hatched. But the secure way in which she was holding me to her made me feel completely safe and cocooned in a love that I had thought died between us. But I could feel it in the careful way Ivy's lips brushed against me, making me squirm against her sure hold on me. It wasn't as…horrible as I thought it would be, having her lips on me. They skimmed the column of my throat as she slowly warmed me up for what was to come. This was like vampire foreplay and though an increasingly small part of me wondered what the hell Ivy was doing kissing my neck and why Glenn wasn't stepping in, I couldn't help but melt into the tender way she touched me and the feel of petal soft lips against my neck.

Then her tongue peeked out, gliding along my neck and I moaned softly as she passed over my scar. Ivy let out a small sigh at most probably the emotions she could scent coming off of me and the scent of my blood, separated from her by such a vulnerable barrier that she could easily rip through without preamble. And the fact that she didn't settled warmly in my chest. She sucked softly on my scar then grazed over it with her sharp teeth. "Ivy," I moaned, arching off the wall and canting my head to the side in offering.

My eyes opened when my head lolled to the side to find Glenn watching us intently. I had never seen the expression on his face that he had now and I didn't know what to make of it. I couldn't tell if he was upset, indifferent, or just…horny. There was a fair amount of pheromones in the room with no open door or window to disperse it. The air was thick with Ivy's desire for me and each time I breathed it in molten spikes of desire would slip to my groin in a way that made my thighs clench together. "Ivy," I moaned with a little more force as she pinched my skin with her fangs but didn't break it. Vampires who were able to maintain their control during a blood balance were known to be notorious teases.

I panted into the thick air in my excitement at having Ivy this close and things to come. My hands winded around her shoulders and settled into her hair on instinct and the way she growled into my neck as I pulled on it caused heat to settle in my jeans.

Then finally, finally after all the waiting, Ivy broke my skin and slid inside of me. Pain registered in my mind for all of a second before heat and pleasure fanned out along my body from where Ivy had bitten me. She moaned languidly against my neck as her hands splayed out on my back. One rested on my upper back while the other bunched up my shirt at my lower back as Ivy tugged me impossibly closer. I could feel her chest against mine and I exhaled harshly at the feel of her soft, generous breasts molding into my more modest ones. She pulled from me slowly, not in a rush to suck me dry, but more in the mood to savor the way that I tasted and how close we were in this moment. It felt like we had never been apart, like Ivy had never kissed me goodbye—no matter how great the kiss was—like she had never hooked back up with Glenn. It was just us, Rachel and Ivy.

Her tongue flicked out along the scar and I whimpered, tugging more on her hair and relishing the muffled moan against my neck. I didn't know Ivy was so…_responsive_. Granted, I had never tried to elicit responses from her, certainly not ones like this, but she was so vocal about what felt good to her and it made me feel good to know that this moment was just as pleasing for her as it was for me.

The hand on my lower back unwound itself from my back to rest on my partly exposed hip. Somewhere along the way my shirt had ridden up and the first touch of Ivy's long pianist fingers against my skin made me squirm. It felt electric and I couldn't tell if it was good or bad, only that I wasn't going to be the one to bat her hand away. Her touch was so light and gentle like it belonged there and not like it was imposing. Ivy pulled away, taking a gulp of breath and breathing harshly against my neck.

"Ivy, no," I whimpered, feeling the loss immediately. I wasn't feeling dizzy. It wasn't too much. I could go another round and I tugged on her hair for emphasis. "More, Ivy," I breathed. I wasn't capable of much speech, not when my body was zinging with a fire between my legs and a tingling scar. My head tipped back against the wall at the simple feel of Ivy's thumb brushing my bare hipbone. I bit my lip as I shivered to stifle a moan at the feeling. Everything felt ultra-sensitive and the only thing my body wanted was to have Ivy inside of me again.

There was rustling in the corner coming from Glenn standing up, but I ignored him and listened to Ivy's irregular breathing. She was enjoying herself, that much I knew. Her wet lips slid along my neck and she slipped inside me without warning. I arched off the wall with a sharp cry, twisting in Ivy's hold as pleasure shot straight between my legs.

She was cruel for not warning me and I suspected she knew that. I clung desperately to her as she began to feed from me again. My blood poured into her mouth like the sweetest offering of all that I was and I knew that Ivy reverently drank every drop of it. We had both missed this. It was obvious in the way Ivy tried to take her time to make it last and the way I wanted her to keep going.

Slim, nimble fingers danced along my torso and my stomach knotted at the near ticklish feeling it created. When Ivy passed by a rib I knew where she was going. I knew yet…I wasn't going to stop her. My eyes clenched shut suddenly as I felt my aura begin to stir. Breath swooshing out of me, adrenaline caused my blood to pump faster into Ivy's waiting, moaning mouth. I recognized what was happening when I felt her aura flick out against mine. It was pure and warm, slowly engulfing my impure one and protecting it the way Ivy always did me. She tensed as it was happening and I knew she could feel the overwhelming intensity, too.

"Ivy," I whispered as our auras began to blend. My heart pounded harder against my chest in anticipation. Ivy was purring softly against my neck as our feelings began to hit a crescendo. Her hand steadily rose higher along my ribcage until—

"Ivy, no," Glenn suddenly spoke, voice low and firm.

She tensed against me, wrapping her arms tighter around me with a warning growl in Glenn's direction that made my knees weaken as she continued to feed.

"That's enough, Ivy," I heard Glenn say, voice now much, much closer. Nothing happened for several seconds as Ivy continued to feed from me. Then her aura slowly began to pull away from mine. I sobbed at the chill that was running through me as the warmth of Ivy receded. I clutched desperately at her in hopes to keep her near but eventually my own aura came back to me and Ivy pulled out. I sagged against the wall with a ragged breath as Ivy licked at the wound on my neck like a starved kitten.

She pressed a parting kiss to my neck then pulled away. Feeling a confusing mixture of satisfied yet completely not, I peeled my eyes open to find Ivy watching me intently for any signs of distress. My eyes slid over to Glenn just over Ivy's left shoulder with a mild glare at the fact that he had stopped her. But I knew why. Ivy was about to take something that I hadn't vocally offered and Glenn was trying to keep things from going too far for my own comfort, but also because Ivy was his girlfriend and I doubted that he wanted to watch her feel up the woman she had been in love with for over two years.

I swallowed thickly as I looked back at Ivy. Her lips were red with my blood and parted to soak up air. I could see the tips of her fangs and longed to have them in me again. Her tongue dragged along her lower lip provocatively in a way that made me ache as she lapped the blood away. She reached out and grabbed my chin gently, tilting my head up until I was looking at her. "Are you okay?"

I nodded, croaking out a rough, "Yes," because I knew she would want a verbal response. "I'm okay," I continued. "Are you?"

Pink tinted her cheeks at the question and I knew she was thinking about the fact that she had almost touched my breast. Which, without the haze of pheromones, was admittedly a little weird. It was even weirder that I hadn't stopped her. Even now as I thought back on it, I wasn't sure if I would have stopped her even in this state.

"I'm fine," she answered vaguely, but with a smile to let me know she meant it. "I didn't take too much, did I? Do you need a brimstone cookie? Because I've got some and—"

"Ivy, I'm okay," I assured with an adoring smile at the furrow of her brow as she assessed me.

From behind her, Glenn leaned in closer to take a good look at me. "She looks good, Ivy." He placed both of his large hands on her shoulders and I frowned a little as my eyes dropped to their point of contact.

Ivy reached out to place a soft hand on my shoulder, her critical gaze continuing to rove over my face. "You should probably get some rest. No more spelling for a few hours."

"You're leaving?" I asked suddenly. The last of her statement made it sound as if she wasn't going to be around to hover over me and _make_ me rest and not spell around in the kitchen.

Her shoulders tensed around the same time her eyes dropped from mine and her hand fell away. "Just for a couple of hours," she answered. "I just have to do something."

I watched the way Glenn massaged her tense shoulders and concluded that the 'something' Ivy was going to do was getting laid. Bloodletting was the ultimate aphrodisiac to vampires. Sex almost always had to come afterwards or some form of physical release. And Ivy did _not_ seem like the type to need to lift her own hand to do her dirty work unless she actually had to.

My eyes pinched together at the information my mind was churning over. She was going to leave and have sex with Glenn. That was okay. Right?

Feeling anxious, I leaned forward and wrapped my arms around her. She stood stiffly in my arms, probably turned on beyond reason and scared to move too much lest her instincts tell her to throw caution to the wind and take me against the wall. I pulled back after a few short seconds, not wanting to take advantage of her state. "Thank you," I told her quietly yet sincerely. What happened was everything I had wanted it to be and more, to sound completely sappy and honest. "And this will happen…more often?" I asked awkwardly, feeling a little shy about basically asking Ivy to bite me whenever she felt because I got a kick out of it.

Ivy brought a hand up to stroke back my unruly red hair that had finagled itself out of the messy bun on my head. "If you want," was all she said.

Knowing she wasn't going to actually come right out and say she wanted it, too, I nodded. She had already mentioned that earlier and I wasn't going to act like some insecure high school girl and demand Ivy to say 'I love you, too' like they do to their significant others.

Not that Ivy was my significant other.

She sighed wistfully and pulled her hand away, stepping back and casting a glance over to Glenn. He gave her a proud smile. "You did well, Tamwood."

Ivy rolled her eyes. "I'm full of surprises." Her voice dropped in octave to convey a meaning that only Glenn would fully be able to comprehend, having been with her before.

I frowned at the innuendo as Ivy turned back to me. "I'll be back soon, okay?"

"Yeah, sure, no problem," I babbled as I followed them to my bedroom door. Glenn opened it and stepped out and Ivy followed after giving me one last look.

"No spelling," she called over her shoulder sternly as she walked down the hallway. "Get some rest."

"I will," I called back with a roll of my eyes. She was so overbearing sometimes.

"Bye, Rachel!" Glenn shouted from the sanctuary.

"See you later, Glenn!"

I closed the door behind me before Jenks had the chance to come out of his hiding place and badger me. I didn't need that right now. I touched my scar as I sat down on the bed. A shiver ran down my spine and how tender it felt, how _good_ it felt. Still, there was a dull emptiness churning in my stomach as I stared at where Ivy and I once were on my wall. I had felt all of her curves pressed against mine as she fed from me and it had felt amazing. It felt perfect. And the pinnacle of that perfection was ruined by Glenn the moment he spoke. Granted, he was trying to stop Ivy from cupping my breast, but…I hadn't minded. And didn't mind now as I sat there and recalled how close Ivy's thumb was to brushing the underside of my breast.

I shifted on the bed as heat shot through me at the thought. Where it was coming from, I didn't know, so I pushed it away, filing it for later once I had enough energy to deal with this.

Instead, I lied back on my bed, turning onto my side and staring at the chair Glenn had been sitting in. Ivy had gone home with him after she bit me, and for some reason I didn't like it. We had shared something so completely intimate and instead of staying home with me, she had left with him. Because he could fulfill one of her needs that I couldn't.

But I—

I decided for now to focus on the way Ivy had made me feel, on the way our auras almost chimed for a second time and how amazing that would have felt.

Even with her hand on my breast.


	5. Chapter 5

**Title: **Hindsight, With a Sixty Percent Chance of About-face

**Pairing: **Rachel Morgan/Ivy Tamwood

**Rating: **PG-13

**Disclaimer: **I do not own these characters. Just having a little fun.

**Summary: **Ever since Ivy had told her she was going to move on, Rachel has been feeling a little out of sorts. But it was just a saying; Ivy wasn't going anywhere. Except, it wasn't, and she was.

* * *

><p>It was a little past midnight when I finally awoke. I stretched into the night chilled air of my dark room, yawning my exhaustion away. My limbs felt heavy with lead, a side effect of bloodletting, but beyond that I was feeling content as I recalled the moment Ivy and I had shared hours ago. A frown quickly set on my face as I also recalled the fact that she had left with Glenn. And more than likely she wasn't home yet.<p>

Curiosity getting the better of me, I stood from the bed, stretching my extremities and walked to the door. I opened it cautiously, hoping to keep Jenks and Wayde at bay as I tiptoed out of my room. The church was dark and eerily quiet as I walked through it. I couldn't hear a single pixy and hoped that they were all asleep as I walked towards the kitchen. Flicking the light on, I was met with the kitchen looking largely the same way I had left it when Ivy, Glenn, and I had ventured to my room.

Which meant that Ivy hadn't been home.

I sighed listlessly as I walked over towards the counter and rummaged under it for my splat guns. I had two now, double the protection. I grabbed a set of blue balls from a row at the edge of the counter and grabbed my syringe from inside a nearby drawer. Frowning, I began injecting the balls one by one. Ivy had said she was only going to be gone for a few hours. How long did it take for her to slake the more physical sides of her lust?

I shuddered at the thought and moved on to the second ball, piercing it with the syringe and filling it with the charm.

"Hey, Rach!"

My heart leapt out of my chest at the greeting and when the syringe fell out of the ball, I leapt back, keeping the charm from touching me because being hit with a sleep charm was _not_ what I needed right now. I was feeling well rested, thank you very much.

"Jenks," I wheezed, dropping the syringe to clutch a hand to my rapidly beating heart. "You scared me!"

He snickered, fluttering about my head with laughter that sounded like wind chimes. "Tinks panties, Rach, you've been out for hours!" he proclaimed, fluttering near my face with narrowed, suspicious eyes.

Feeling a flush creep up my neck that caused my scar to tingle in memory of Ivy, I turned away from him to pick up the syringe again. I grabbed a third ball and stuck my syringe through it. I felt a current of wind from Jenks's wings flutter against my left shoulder as he leaned closer. "You reek of Ivy," he accused.

"I always smell like her," I declared succinctly. "We live together."

Jenks "hmm'd" as he floated around me. He flew to my other shoulder and I stiffened at the tiny gasp that escaped him. "Damn it, Rach, she bit you!" he bellowed, sounding completely offended at the very idea. A gust of red fairy dust sparkled from him in his outrage. "Where's that fairy fart of a vampire? Did she take too much?" he babbled. "Was that why you were passed out in your room for several hours?"

"_No!_" I declared as forcefully so I could to get him to shut it. "Yes!" I think amended, confused to which question I was answering. "Just—stop talking, Jenks!" I finished, losing steam. I placed my loaded splat gun to the side and grabbed the other one to refill. The metallic weight of it felt heavy in my hand and I suppressed an amused snicker at the thought of turning around and whacking Jenks with it to get him to shut up. He could probably outfly it though. "I…asked her to bite me," I said quietly, ducking my head to fill up another ball, but also to avoid Jenks's gaze. I had been so adamant about not letting Ivy bite me again that going back on my word made me feel like a hypocrite. But I had vowed to never let her bite me again because I was scared of the whole vampire business—shadows and scions, being sucked dry and left for dead. But if she had enough control to bite Glenn now, then she could bite me, damn it.

Jenks snorted in disbelief, flying all around me as if he couldn't keep still while processing information that we had all thought we'd never have to go through again. "You _let_ her bite you?" he asked incredulously.

"Yep," I said, popping the _p_ sound to convey my annoyance at his asking. Jenks was nosy, which was fine most of the time because he was just as much a part of this house as either I or Ivy, but when it came to my relationship with Ivy more often than not his butting in made things even more complicated.

"Rach, don't go jerking the girl around like that," Jenks said, a touch of sadness to his voice that gripped my heart in sympathy for Ivy. But I wasn't trying to jerk her around. I just wanted my friend back.

"I'm not," I grumbled, sounding like a petulant child with Jenks scolding me.

"Then what are you doing?" Tired from feeling overwhelming emotions at once, he flew over to the windowsill above the sink and sat atop it. The window was thankfully closed to keep the cold air out, and I knew he'd be safe there.

I sat down the empty ball that I was ready to inject with the charm and braced my hand on the counter as I contemplated the question. I knew what I was doing, more or less. But I didn't really know what I wanted or was expecting out of this whole thing. "I just miss her," I whispered.

"Since when do you want Ivy to bite you?"

"Since recent?" I shot back, knowing the answer was a flimsy one, but not knowing how to defend myself. I admitted that I had jumped head first into this whole blood balance thing without much thought. It was my nature, sue me. But I trusted Ivy, and that was enough. "I just did it so we could be closer," I rambled on in the stretching silence when Jenks had gone uncharacteristically silent.

He folded one tiny, though muscular leg over the other, eyes narrowing as he stared at me. "Closer?" he drawled out as if tasting the word on his tongue. Then, he continued softly. "Closer how, Rach?"

I stopped short, the memory of Ivy's long, pale fingers trekking up my twitching abdomen assaulting my brain, where they would have gone and the lax way I had allowed her to continue. It had felt so…natural, having her hand there, having it go further and, a little frighteningly, I knew I wouldn't have stopped her had Glenn not have stepped in.

"Rachel, you had better be in this house!"

I lurched back at the sound of Wayde's voice startling me. The syringe in my grip squirted out the charm onto my skin and all of a sudden I felt woozy.

"Holy, hell!" I heard Jenks exclaim as my vision swam. It felt like someone had stuffed cotton balls into my ears when he called out, "Rach, are you all right? Rach? Say something, damn it!"

I grappled sluggishly for the edge of the countertop as I slinked down to the floor. The next thing I saw were the bright kitchen lights above me before everything went black.

* * *

><p>I sputtered uncontrollably, limbs flailing to save myself as a trickle of water began to shoot up my nose.<p>

"Easy, easy," a voice, Wayde, said in an effort to soothe me. But I only fought harder at the thought of my crazy body guard being the deciding factor of this life or death situation. "Stop fighting!" he demanded, grunting when my open palm slapped against his chin. "Crazy witch," he muttered.

"How is she?" Ivy demanded brusquely from a little ways away. I recognized her voice immediately and the ticked off growl that saturated it. My eyes blinked open an instant later to take in my surroundings.

I was in my bathtub.

With my hands mashed into Wayde's face.

A loud snickering at my expense pulled my eyes up to Jenks resting high on a corner of the door. Then my eyes dropped to find Ivy looking irate and sexy at the threshold of the door, her hands braced on either side of the doorframe as if it was taking all of her control to not run inside, scoop me up and walk away. My mind tripped and fell, lingering over the thought of Ivy's slim arms flexing under the weight of carrying me to my bedroom, and how she'd lay me on my bed and—

I inhaled deeply and pulled my eyes away from midnight black eyes full of concern. My eyes drifted down my body to find that I was topless and my jeans were off, leaving me in a sports bra and skimpy underwear. What the hell?

Wayde shifted uncomfortably beside me as if having read my thoughts through the furrow of my brow as he watched me. "I had to get your clothes off and get you in a salt bath. You, ah, got hit with your own sleep charms."

_Yep_, I thought as the memory came back to me. I remembered well. "Because you came screaming through the house like a banshee!" I accused irately, pulling myself up to lie back against the tub. I was still feeling a little woozy and that bout of irritation didn't help any. Good nap, though, I had to admit.

"The church was pitch black when I came down from the belfry!" Wayde yelled, seeming to manage to accuse me with his exclamation. "I thought you were gone!"

"Screw this," Ivy said lowly from the doorway. I looked over as she jerked into motion, rolling up the sleeves of her tight sweater that amplified her breasts as she stalked towards me. She glared at Wayde until he backed aside and then her hands were in the water, wrapping around me and lifting me up as if I weighted nothing.

"Hey!" I exclaimed, more in surprise than protest. Though, I _was_ capable of walking on my own. I wasn't helpless, just a little dizzy still and pissed off at Wayde.

"Are you okay?" Ivy asked as she stared down at me. There was a thin band of warm brown coming back to her eyes, and I knew that she was starting to feel calm now that she had her hands on me and she felt that I was safe.

I had always known that she cared for me, but to see that love shining through now, after all this time, after she told me that she was moving on made me smile and I shifted closer to her. My arm brushed her breasts and I inhaled deeply, staring up in her eyes as that ring of brown that had been there previously vanished. "I'm fine," I whispered, watching her no doubt watching my reactions. She was very observant, not to mention the fact that she could scent my emotions at the drop of a hat. "When did you get here?" I continued, brow furrowing.

She bent at the knees, jostling me slightly and I looked around us, noticing that she was opening the door to my room.

"Is she okay?" Wayde called out from somewhere behind us.

"Get bent, Wayde!" I yelled back, peeved and embarrassed that my own charm put me out like that.

Ivy straightened and kick my door open just shy of ripping it off of its hinges. I swallowed thickly at her show of strength. She was still on edge from a simple charm, and the thought made me smile. "I'm okay, Ivy, really," I assured.

She sat me down on my bed gently and though I didn't want to get my bed sheets drenched because of the water still clinging to my skin, I didn't protest. She was moving at vampiric speed around the room and it was probably best that I didn't disturb her. She quickly walked over to flick on the light beside my door and closed my door, looking around the room. Seeing a throw blanket on the chair in the corner of the room, Ivy sped over there like her life depended on it. She picked it up and walked back over to me.

I sucked in a huge breath and held it, feeling my heart rate pick up as she hovered over me with black eyes, silky hair cascading down her shoulders and partially obscuring her face. She fluffed out the blanket and laid it over me. I really didn't like to be fussed over, but Ivy's constant need to nurture overrode my slight urge to shoo her away. "I'm okay," I said once again.

"Are you dizzy at all?" she asked softly, ignoring my attempt to get her to stop fretting over me.

"A little," I grumbled, my pride taking more of a hit than my head when it slumped to the floor. "Just a side effect to further subdue someone when they come to. I'll be fine."

She hesitated, taking her bottom lip between her teeth as her gaze raked down my body. I felt a flush take over my body at the predatory way she hovered over me, looking dangerously beautiful yet nervous in a way that only Ivy could accomplish. "Do you want…me to dress you?" she asked, voice nothing but a breath as she met my gaze again.

The question made my heart pound for some unknown reason beneath my breast and I nodded just once. Ivy stood from the bed and walked over to my dresser. "Which drawer has your nightwear?"

Embarrassed, I tucked a lock of wet hair behind my ear as I thought of how what I wore at night paled in comparison to what Ivy must wear. "Bottom drawer," I breathed. Then she bent at the waist to reach the drawer in an incredible display of flexibility considering how impossibly long her legs were. Her shirt rode up to show the smooth expanse of her lower back and my wandering gaze drank it in, looking lower to her ass before straying away.

Feeling my face warm, I pulled back the throw and stood from the bed. I stood there for a few seconds to find my equilibrium and walked over to Ivy. "It's okay; I've got it," I told her.

She spun around with a pair of short shorts and a t-shirt clutched in her hand. "I can do this for you," she insisted.

That always seemed to be her motto when it came to me and it both made me love her more and broke my heart. "No, Ivy, really." I stared at the clothes and took a step closer to reach for them. Ivy pulled them back and I huffed, glaring up at her determinedly. It was only then that I noticed how close we were. Her lips were right at my eye level, and I stared at them, remembering how they felt brushing along by neck hours ago. A shy pink tongue darted out to run over full lips and something hot clenched inside of me at the sight.

Ivy's grip on my clothes slackened as she took a step back. "You're right," she said thickly, voice tinged with a husky drawl. "You seem to be fully functional."

I blushed, knowing she was referring to my sometimes more than healthy libido. She brushed past me in a wave of vampire incense and I quickly turned around before she was out the door. "Ivy," I suddenly called out.

She gripped the door handle tightly as if to promise herself that she was leaving before turning around to look at me.

I smiled, feeling awkward about the way my body was reacting to her, but not really wanting her to leave. "Thanks for…coming home," I said, somewhat awkwardly. It wasn't really what I wanted to say—of course she would have come home eventually. Right? I had no idea what I wanted to say, but it seemed my brain was willing to churn out anything to keep her from leaving. At least I hadn't said anything stupid. Yet.

Actually, it was probably best that she left before I did.

She smiled, close lipped, and nodded a little. "I always come home," she said simply, though her words were heavy as her dark eyes bore into mine, and I nodded in understanding of…something that I wasn't too sure of but I knew that the way she said it was important enough for me to take it as more than simple face value. She turned to the door, hesitated, then turned back to me. "Just…try not to let your spells backfire next time. That seems like a rookie witch mistake."

"It was Wayde's fault!" I bellowed as she walked out the door with a dark chuckle of amusement.

Stupid, arrogant…sexy vampire.

Completely flustered, I turned around, only now noticing that I had given Ivy a view of basically everything. I dragged on my tank top and shorts with a huff. I reached into another drawer and grabbed my cordless hairdryer. _Swell_, I thought. Starting in on this tangled hair was going to be a disaster.

I had been thinking about Ivy lately. A lot more than usual. And Jenks and Wayde were starting to pick up on something happening between us from my end. I felt my chest get heavy all of a sudden as the sardonic thought of people finally having the _right_ idea about us popping into my head. It couldn't be that, could it? I was straight, had been straight my entire life. I mean, sure I could appreciate when a woman was beautiful, what woman with the sense of sight couldn't? But Ivy was…Ivy was Ivy. She was different. And the more time she was spending out of the house with Glenn, the more I wanted to be around her, wrap myself around her and keep her home with me.

_Holy_ _shit_, I thought to myself. _It can't be_…

There was a fist banging loudly on my door and I lurched back into my dresser, covering myself as if I was once again naked. I turned off my hairdryer so that I could hear better. "Yeah!" I called out, a little irritated. That seemed to be my mood of choice tonight.

"I got a call from Glenn," came Ivy's soft voice through the door. "Crime scene in a half hour." She hesitated by the door before saying, "I made coffee."

Relief and tension flowed through me at once. I was thankful for the coffee and even more thankful for the chance to move along in this case. Walking towards the door, I opened it to see Ivy standing on the other side. Her eyes had yet to return to their normal warm brown and I imagined the fact that we were about to go to a crime scene only ratcheted up the tension she had been feeling earlier when she had no doubt found me passed out in my bathtub with Wayde hovering over me.

"Thank you," I muttered once again. It was starting to become a theme, but for some reason that I didn't care to find out I wanted her to know that she was appreciated around this house for everything she did for me.

Ivy shrugged a shoulder. "No problem." Then she spun around and walked towards the kitchen. I followed behind her, yelling, "Jenks!" over my shoulder.

I walked into the kitchen and grabbed a mug from the cabinet closest to the sink. Then I set up station beside the coffee pot as I waited another two minutes for it to finish.

"What's going on?" Jenks asked, a sudden burst of excited fairy dust. "I heard crime scene."

I smiled at his enthusiasm. "We're about to go to one."

"Acutally, ah, Jenks?" Ivy began from where she was packing everything up into a small bag at the table. He fluttered over to her. "I was wondering if you could stay here."

"No fairy-assed way—"

"I'm taking my bike," Ivy deadpanned.

_She sure was_, I thought to myself, only now realizing that she was head to toe in leather. It choked every curve she had to offer effortlessly, and my mouth dried when she straightened, the curve of her ass looking more pronounced as she stood erect. "Damn, you look good," I breathed with a thick swallow.

I watched her take a deep breath, and turned away from her to fill up my cup of coffee. "Thank you," she murmured lowly. "You going to change?"

I nodded. "As soon as I can get this cup in me."

"Now wait a minute! I want to go!" Jenks declared, sounding like a five year old. "Why the hell you gotta take your bike?"

Ivy shushed him, informing him that his children were asleep and all hell was going to break loose if they awoke. They were whispering lowly, but I heard something about Ivy not being able to be trapped in a car with my smell while she was this hyped up, even with the window down. Then I heard something about a quick getaway just in case—I didn't hear anything after that, and I frowned at the thought of them talking about me as if I wasn't in the room.

I opened my mouth to protest this little conversation about me _without_ me that they were having, but from behind the wall leading to the kitchen came a sleepy looking were. Wayde's beard was matted to his face unflatteringly as he scratched at his head as he walked into the kitchen. I watched for recognition of what was happening to settle on his face as I took a luxurious sip of the coffee Ivy had made for me. It tasted divine and warmth flooded my entire body from just one sip.

Wayde took one look at Ivy, then his eyes drifted to me. "'S going on?" he asked sleepily. I shrugged, hiding a smile behind my mug of coffee as I took another sip. My poor were body guard. I gave him a lot of grief, but it was mostly because I hated the thought of someone watching over me. The fact that we were leaving on Ivy's bike and there wasn't room for him gave me a little thrill.

Ivy ignored him as she straightened up, closed her bag, and slung it over her shoulders. She walked swiftly out of the kitchen and Wayde had to dodge the freight train of a vampire as she glided past him.

"What's going on?" Wayde asked again, more alert as he watched me come towards him.

"Run stuff," I chirped, patting him on the shoulder as I passed by. "Go back to bed, Wayde. The adults will handle this."

"You screwy witch," he snarled, coming after me.

The hair on the back of my neck stood on end, but I was already to my room and closing my door before he could catch up. He banged once, loudly on my door, and I frowned. "You don't want to wake up Jenks's kids, do you?" I called loudly as I rushed to my closet to grab my leathers. Ivy had said a half hour but I knew her well enough to know that since she was ready now, she was probably going to go now. "I'm going, Wayde, so it's your choice—go back to sleep peacefully, or spend the next several hours entertaining pixies."

"You're not going to be happy until you get yourself killed!" he growled.

"Ivy's got my back," was all I said. And it explained so, so much.

"You're just gonna let her go?" I heard Wayde ask who I assumed was Ivy outside my door.

"She's a grown woman," was all Ivy said, voice a dark purr that sent a shiver down my spine. It was pitch black outside and working alongside her this time of night was probably not the best idea. But damn it, I was going anyway. This was Ivy, this was a case, put them both together and there was no way I could resist, really.

I swung open the door a moment later donned in my leather pants, some vamp boots Ivy had bought me about a year ago, and my leather jacket. Wayde's eyes nearly bulged out of his head and though I appreciated the compliment, I shrugged it off and kept moving. "I'll be back in a little while, okay?" I tossed over my shoulder as I walked away. I passed by the kitchen to find Jenks sulking on the edge of Ivy's table. I felt bad for him. I really did, but I was willing to bet that it was going to be cold as hell outside and even colder on Ivy's bike because of the wind. He wouldn't make it halfway there and I wasn't willing to risk his life.

I didn't tell him bye, knowing the pixy would think I was trying to rub the fact that I was going and he was staying in his face. Instead, I followed a silent Ivy outside. We walked a little ways towards the side of the church and standing there proudly, purring the way I had heard Ivy do several times, was her bike. It had one headlight, shining brightly to cloud my vision as I followed Ivy's silhouette of a trim waist and twisting hips as she walked towards her motorcycle. _Don't think about it_, I told myself. _You don't feel that way_.

I stood beside her as she fished a helmet from the back of the bike and gave it to me. "Here, you can wear this."

I stared down at the helmet, then looked around the bike, perturbed. "Where's yours?" I asked.

She shrugged a shoulder, smiling until her fangs slipped from around her lips and I shivered. "I don't need one."

The grin on her face turned mocking and I had the distinct feeling that I was being treated like a child. "Then I don't need one," I declared. _My head was going to be all over this pavement_, I thought to myself, but held Ivy's gaze firmly. If she didn't need a helmet, neither did I.

Ivy shrugged with that same shit-eating grin on her face and placed her helmet onto the steps of the side entrance to the church. "When will you learn, silly witch," she muttered to herself. She lifted one long, toned leg and hoisted it over the bike with ease. My eyes widened at the sight of her straddling it before she sank down on the rumbling bike. She turned back to stare at me, looking completely dangerous as she told me, "Get on."

Heart pounding erratically in my chest, I placed one hand on Ivy's shoulder and another on the back of the seat as I hoisted myself a little less gracefully on the bike. I scooted up close behind her, wrapping my arms around her waist as the knowledge that I _really_ didn't have a helmet sank in. I was too hardheaded for my own good sometimes. I felt Ivy tense at the secure feel of my arms around her and I only tightened my hold more. There was no way we would be able to make it to the crime scene safely if she was feeling on edge the entire way.

I leaned in closer, bringing a hand up to brush a lock of hair away from her ear. "Ivy," I breathed in her ear, wrapping her arms tightly around her again. "Calm down," I continued. She was so soft everywhere and she smelled so damn good. She smelled citrusy, but behind that, she smelled like flowers. She had sprayed something before we left and I didn't know if it was for my benefit or Glenn's. "It's just me."

I felt her back heave as she inhaled a shaky breath. "It's never _just_ anything with you, Rachel," she said a moment later.

Stunned, I sat back a little until I wasn't breathing on her ear anymore. Ivy kicked up the kickstand, revved up the bike, and in a second we were in motion. I sank back, still holding her about the waist as I thought over her words. That wasn't the first time she had said that to me. She had said it to me a couple of weeks ago when she worried that I was going to get into trouble for going to the store and I tried to assure her that I was _just_ going to the store. Then she had said the exact opposite, what she had said to me just now. What was she talking about? Was she just being contradictory? Or was she trying to say that there was always more to everything I did than meets the eye? And if so, what the hell was I doing just now that would warrant such a statement? I was just trying to get her to calm down. Granted, I suppose I could have chosen a less intimate way.

I broke out of my thoughts when we slammed to a stop. My forehead brushed against Ivy's shoulder and, scared, I kept it there. We must have been at a stoplight and Ivy must have been going well above the speed limit to have to jerk to a stop so abruptly like that. "You have a non-vamp passenger here, you know," I called feebly from my spot on Ivy's shoulder.

I felt her body shake slightly and sourly guessed she was laughing at my expense. Whatever. The rumbling of the motorcycle between my thighs made me antsy and I scooted closer behind Ivy, wrapping my arms tightly around her as I buried my face into the back of her shoulder. I could feel her hair flowing in the wind as we began to take off again and it created satiny ticklish feelings against my ear and neck.

The rumbling turned into a full vibration between my thighs now that we were moving again. It struck the very core of me and I twitched, leaning up to bury my face into Ivy's neck to stifle what I was sure to be a moan. I was confused as hell as to what was even going on. I had ridden this bike before, but now it felt so different. Now my hold around Ivy's waist was so iron tight that I was sure it would hurt any human, but Ivy was slowly relaxing into it. I panted mutely into her neck as my thighs clenched around the vibrating seat I was attached to. I could feel Ivy everywhere. And she felt so damn soft and strong at the same time.

We came to another stop and the vibration under me lessened, but only barely.

"We're almost there," Ivy declared breathlessly.

She sounded like sex and the thought caused my hips to pump out against her ass on their own accord. My face flushed in embarrassment and arousal as I burrowed further into her neck. "Sorry," I breathed. I didn't understand why I couldn't control myself all of a sudden. And thoughts that I was having earlier in my room came flooding back. The _right_ idea about us.

I shifted awkwardly as Ivy took off again, feeling how wet my underwear were and I groaned quietly into Ivy's neck. I felt her tense in my arms again, but I didn't even bother to apologize.

Then it all seemed to click.

The loneliness I had been feeling since Ivy had told me she was moving on, my sudden need to be around her all the time, the fact that I wanted a blood balance with her, the fact that I didn't feel bothered to move her hand away when she was biting me, knowing exactly where she was going with it, my sudden appreciation for everything she does, my arousal now on the back of her bike as I held her tightly to me with my face buried into her neck.

I was in love with Ivy.

Hooooly shit.

I had stepped in it. Royally. That was what Jenks had meant weeks ago when he had told me just that. I thought he was referring to my going to the store, but he hadn't been. He had already known even then how I felt about Ivy.

I had always loved her, would always love her, but it had been nothing but platonic in the past. But as we pulled into the parking lot of an abandoned building, where the crime scene was, I realized that I was beginning to lust after her. And combined with the love that I already felt for her...

Ivy killed the engine and I wobbled off of her motorcycle on shaky legs. I knew my cheeks were flushed in arousal and embarrassment for how I was carrying on. She was my friend and I had basically dry humped her on the way to the crime scene because her bike was vibrating against me and feeling her in my arms was doing it for me.

She stepped off the bike, too, and inhaled a deep breath of clean air before turning around to face me. I didn't know what to say. I had apologized minutes ago, but that wouldn't obliterate what I had done. Ivy glared hard at me for a long moment, lust and disbelief clear in her charcoal eyes.

Then she turned away. I was left dumbfounded as she quickly walked towards the building, hair waving behind alluringly. Feeling cold all of a sudden, I pulled my jacket tighter around me and folded my arms across my chest as I followed behind her. I bit my lip in contemplation, wondering if it was true.

If Ivy really had gotten sick of me and moved on.


	6. Chapter 6

**Title: **Hindsight, With a Sixty Percent Chance of About-face

**Pairing: **Rachel Morgan/Ivy Tamwood

**Rating: **PG-13

**Disclaimer: **I do not own these characters. Just having a little fun.

**Summary: **Ever since Ivy had told her she was going to move on, Rachel has been feeling a little out of sorts. But it was just a saying; Ivy wasn't going anywhere. Except, it wasn't, and she was. 

* * *

><p>Ivy was pissed with a capital P.<p>

We had been on the scene for about twenty minutes and she hadn't spoken to me since we arrived. Actually, even when we arrived she hadn't spoken to me. She had just stared at me, her gaze smoldering and burning holes through me in what was probably equal parts anger and arousal. It made for a heady combination that still drew her shoulders taut as she and Glenn gathered what little evidence that was around.

Sighing, I hoisted myself up on the desk I was resting back on. We were in a business office where a dead, disfigured witch was discovered. I shivered at what little I could still see of her as some I.S. officers bagged her up. I was typically on the outskirts when it came to a crime scene. Everyone was always worried that I would accidently tamper with or destroy evidence, as if I was _really_ that clumsy and unprofessional. _Pleeease_, I thought sardonically to myself. I was damn good at my job, and it annoyed me that everyone else thought otherwise.

I looked around to see that I had garnered Nina's attention, her dark eyes watching me silently. _Swell_. Nina was a low level living vamp. She was nowhere near as powerful and influential as Ivy, but she had a master undead vamp who had taken her under his wing. I figured whoever influenced her more often than not when she was around I.S. and F.I.B. professionals was a man by the decidedly masculine stance and demeanor Nina took on whenever the master vamp took over. She had begun to dress better now that she had gained favor and though I knew she was excited, I was terrified for her. I had seen the same thing happen with Ivy and Piscary and…it didn't end well.

Nina straightened, smoothing down her suit jacket, and began walking over to me with a fang-filled smile. I watched her silently, figuring this was Nina and not the undead vamp whom normally walked much more suave, gliding along the floor in a way Nina did not as she saddled up beside me. She was excited, and damn did it showed as vampire pheromones poured over me. I breathed them in deeply, my eyelids lowering as I watched Ivy's svelte form waltz around the crime scene with ease. She wasn't going to talk to me for the rest of the night; I knew it. Which meant the ride home was going to be painfully awkward.

I sulked a little, missing Jenks because he was an annoying bug from time to time, but he was a great friend and terrific at relieving awkward tension.

Nina was a buzzing ball of unnerving energy by my side and I turned to engage her in conversation, deciding to leave my own relationship—or lack thereof—issues for another day. Plus, she was a vamp who was beside me, beside my vulnerable scar and all of my attention needed to be focused on _that_ tidbit of information right now.

"Hi, Nina," I greeted merrily. She was an excitable person and was the type of person who needed to be met with as much enthusiasm.

"Hey, Rachel!" She smiled infectiously. "I'm so glad to be doing field work instead of being behind my desk."

It was like crickets chirping in the background as I shifted uncomfortably on the desk I was sitting on, casting a sympathetic glance at the dead witch in the bag. "Yeah," I drawled. Nina lacked tact sometimes.

She was quiet beside me for a long moment and though I could empathize with the fact that she didn't have a way with words, _really_ I could, I wasn't in a hurry to save her from her social faux-pas. I was uneasy with the way Ivy and Glenn stood close to each other, head to head and talking lowly. Sure, I knew that they were talking about the case more than likely, and I knew that Ivy was a naturally affectionate person with those she cared about. I swallowed a lump of emotion down my throat. She was affectionate with people who _let_ her be, and I had spent years warding off her growing affection for me because I had been terrified of her. The same way I was uneasy about Nina being so close beside me. But I was beginning to realize all the things I had missed out on by first, being afraid of Ivy, and secondly by denying the obvious attraction I had to her all this time.

"Forgive her," a lower, more velvety smooth voice said from beside me. I deflated in exasperation, knowing that the master vampire had taken over and Nina was no longer there. "She'll learn."

"Hi," I commented stiffly. I still had a bone to pick with the master vamp using Nina like she wasn't a person because I knew he was going to toss her away like scum afterwards. If she survived. "I'm sure you'll break her right in," I continued with steel creeping into my voice.

"Some people have to be broken."

I casted a sympathetic glance to Ivy, the beautiful broken woman several feet ahead of me talking to a couple of I.S. officials. She no longer spoke of it, but there were times when I could still see the haunted, almost lost look on her face as she spaced out, no doubt thinking of Piscary. I told her that she could talk to me whenever she felt but she never did. And there was a part of me that wanted to hold her and let her cry on my shoulder when those unbearable moments would surface where her memories just wouldn't leave her alone.

From beside me Nina relaxed back into place with an elbow on the desk, and my lips turned downwards into a frown. Her nose tilted higher in the air as she began to sniff.

"You smell like Ivy," she purred after a silent moment. I shivered from the implication laced in the tone of her voice. I had been thrown in a salt bath while unconscious and I still had Ivy's scent covering me. And I was more than sure that I was still all over her.

"We carpooled," I said simply, crossing my arms across my chest to convey the message that I didn't want to talk.

Nina smiled, sharp and feral, a far cry from how the young woman normally smiled. "You do more than carpool," she accused in a whisper-quiet voice.

My spine stiffened at the comment, and Ivy looked over to me immediately. Her head popped up from where she and Glenn had been huddled over a baggie of evidence and her eyes, a warm brown, met mine squarely. Her gaze then flicked to Nina, then back to me as if to ask me if I was okay.

I nodded once, shifting on the desk to convey that I was uneasy but it was manageable. She stared at me for a moment longer, then slowly looked back down to where she and Glenn were working.

"She knows we were talking about her," Nina said.

I shrugged with a nod. "Yep."

It was quiet for a moment, then Nina shifted closer until the hairs on my neck stood on end. "You have a fresh wound," she purred.

An iced chill of warning shot down my spine and I turned to find Nina watching me intently. Slowly hopping off the desk, I began taking measured steps back, remembering that this _was_ a vampire, after all. "Ah, Nina?"

From my peripheral Ivy spun around with vampire quickness and sauntered over to us. She came to a stop in front of Nina and me in a scent of orange juice, flowers, and vampire incense, creating a triangle in an attempt to keep us both in her vision.

"Are you okay, Rachel?" Her gray silk voice was strained with tension as if she was more than ready to go toe to toe with the undead vamp. I nodded, but it was Nina who responded.

"There's no problem at all, Ms. Tamwood. I was just admiring your work." Her expression was sly and coquettish as she eyed Ivy.

I flushed as Ivy turned to look at me, her expression completely blank.

"How about you mind your own business, Nina," I barked out in annoyance.

Nina turned to look at me, her young, round face morphing into innocence though her eyes swirled in amusement. "But this is my business," she insisted. "If Ivy's hunting you, then that means you're off limits."

"She's always been off limits," Ivy said immediately in a chilling tone, taking on an aggressive stance. "And I'm not hunting her."

I felt a flicker of disappointment at the last of her statement. Man, what was wrong with me?

Still amused with the situation Nina had found herself in, she pushed off the desk and walked towards Ivy with a masculine swagger. "Does that mean that you're off limits, too…Ms. Tamwood?"

"Go turn yourself," Ivy growled, a deep sound of frustration that pulsed through me.

They both recognized my spike in arousal and turned to look at me, amusement still firmly set in the undead vamp's gaze. "You've got a live one on your hands, Ivy," she said so lowly I almost couldn't heart it.

Ivy inhaled a deep breath, and I could practically hear her counting backwards from five in her head. "Come on," she said after a short pause. "We've gathered the evidence. We can go now."

She spun around and began walking away before I could even say anything.

Unconsciously I began to tug at the bracelet on my arm as if to remove it, though that would be nearly impossible with Trent's help. "Ivy is off limits," I said succinctly as I turned to Nina. "If you try to make a move on her, I'll make sure that by the time I'm through with you something will be permanently damaged," I threatened, not caring that Ivy could hear.

Nina clasped her hands behind her back with a smirk. "I wouldn't dream of it." 

* * *

><p>The ride home was silent. I kept my face buried into the back of Ivy's shoulder and held her tightly as we winded through the roads at unreal speeds. She smelled so good and I took her in, wondering how I could have been so stupid this whole time.<p>

Tears began to prick my eyes as I burrowed deeper into her shoulder.

I'm not gay.

I couldn't be gay. I had gone from white witch, to black witch, to shunned demon associate, to actual _demon_. From the I.S. to an out of work independent who was trying to keep the I.S. from killing me for quitting, to an actual independent who got jobs down the pipe every few months that threatened to end my very existence. From knowing who my very capable father was as a child, to finding out as an adult that my father was more or less a sort of washed up rocker who still had groupies. Gross.

I didn't like change. At all. But I had faced it through several points in my life, sometimes with tears, and moved on. The _only_ part of my life that had remained constant and unchanged over the years was my sexual attraction to men.

And then…Ivy came along and tested my sexual fluidity, chopping down the borders of my heterosexuality every day with her dangerous curves, expressive eyes, soft voice, and her unending devotion towards me. And it had gotten to the point where I was forced to deal with the fact that…I wanted her. So badly, and the revelation caused fresh tears to sting my eyes.

"Rachel?"

"I'm fine," I whispered, knowing she could smell the salt of my tears.

It was quiet for a moment, the only sound being the low purr of Ivy's bike as we sat at a stoplight. "No, you aren't," Ivy whispered back.

I took a deep breath and held it, hoping she would leave it at that as I laid my head on her shoulder, looking out into the crisp night air as she drove us home.

Ivy held the door for me, her gaze washing over my face intently as I brushed past her and walked inside. I could hear her footsteps a hovering two feet behind me, and I wasn't even remotely afraid. In the past we had kept our distance at a customary eight feet, but somewhere along the way it had shortened.

We hadn't spoken a word in the last fifteen minutes because I was so damn confused as to what I was supposed to do. She was with Glenn. I had had my chance and, in typical Rachel Morgan fashion, I had failed to see what was in front of me while it was there. Now that Ivy was gone I was pining after her like a high school girl with a crush. She had told me months ago to let her move on. And I was trying, I really was. But I also really, really wanted her now.

Even though I wasn't sure what to even do if I were to have her.

I stormed into the kitchen in a huff of confused emotions that made me angry and slumped into a seat at the table. I cradled my head in my hands, resting my elbows on my thighs with a shaky intake of breath as Ivy's scent swirled all around me.

"Rachel?"

She sounded really worried as she knelt before me, placing a supportive hand on my thigh that made me inhale deeply. I shook my head to let her know nothing was wrong, though everything was out of sorts. Her hand disappeared a moment later, and I was a little sad she was gone.

But then gentle hands with long, skillful fingers that I shuddered to think about grabbed my hands and pried them from my face. Ivy's gaze darted over me in concern. "Dear heart…" she sighed knowingly with love coating her words.

I shook my head. "I don't—I can't—not yet," I babbled, hoping she would understand as my chest heaved with oncoming hysterics.

Her thumb rubbed soothing circles against the pulse point in my wrist. Her eyes were a warm brown that made my chest ache. I was proud that I was the reason why she was so calm and sated.

"Okay." She leaned up and closer to me. "Whenever you're ready we can talk."

She stood enough until we were face to face. My heart rate picked up speed as she leaned in closer and her eyes slipped shut. Her lips pressed fleetingly against the corner of my mouth and a gasp tore from my throat at the soft contact.

"Good night," Rachel," she whispered against me.

I wanted nothing more than to wrap an arm around her and make her hold me until I was better, but I was stronger than that damn it, and I resisted. I swallowed thickly. "Good night, Ivy."

She was nothing but a memory a moment later as the door to her room clicked shut. I heaved a deep breath, wondering why my chest felt so sore. I brushed my hands down my leather pants and stood up, turning around and stilling at the sight of Wayde standing there.

His looked like a dear caught in headlights with widening eyes as he stared at me. "I, uh, just wanted to make sure you made it home safely," he said.

I took a step closer, rubbing at my wet eyes. "How much did you hear?"

His smile turned mysterious. "Enough to know that you still gotta shot."


	7. Chapter 7

**Title: **Hindsight, With a Sixty Percent Chance of About-face

**Pairing: **Rachel Morgan/Ivy Tamwood

**Rating: **PG-13

**Disclaimer: **I do not own these characters. Just having a little fun.

**Summary: **Ever since Ivy had told her she was going to move on, Rachel has been feeling a little out of sorts. But it was just a saying; Ivy wasn't going anywhere. Except, it wasn't, and she was. 

* * *

><p>"Okay, what the hell, Rach? You and Ivy have been acting weird for over a week now ever since that day you guys ditched me to go to that crime scene." Jenks was a blur as he buzzed from one side of me to the other in anxious energy. "What happened out there?"<p>

From several feet away, tucked into his own little corner of the kitchen, Wayde snickered at the question. I shot him a mild glare with narrowed eyes, then turned back to the dinner at hand. I was cooking a nice meal for me and Ivy. She had been gone all day on a run and I knew by the time she would come home she'd be hungry and probably agitated. I hadn't seen her in hours and if I was being honest with myself, I was really missing her.

"Nothing happened, Jenks," I muttered, sounding like a broken record. Wayde still held tight to his amusement, having seen me crying in the kitchen a week ago because I had come to the realization that I was in love with Ivy and it had scared the shit out of me, _still_ scared the shit out of me. I didn't really know what I was doing and, thankfully, Ivy wasn't pushing the issue. Still, I recognized the fact that sooner or later I was going to have to step up to the plate or I'd lose her for good…if I hadn't already.

I hadn't seen Glenn in about a week but that in no way meant Ivy wasn't still seeing him. I didn't know and I didn't have the nerve to ask. But my curiosity was getting the better of me…

I was getting antsy. The realization that I was in love with Ivy had hit me like a freight train and I felt that I was still plastered onto the front of it, going hundreds of miles an hour with no stop in sight. I kept thinking about her, about how good she looked in her leathers every time she wore them before a run, about how the warm brown of her eyes would shrink in hunger and arousal when I inadvertently made what seemed to be inevitable slip-ups, how soft her hair had been, sliding through my fingertips when she fed from me. It had felt like such a long time ago.

"Rachel!"

I lurched out of my thoughts, glancing over at Wayde. "What?"

He smiled teasingly, probably guessing where my thoughts had been. "I think the chicken's done."

Adrenaline pulsed through me along with horror as I quickly turned everything off and removed the chicken from the stove. A winded sigh escaped me. It still looked good. A little burnt, but it was blackened chicken—Ivy's favorite—and it was expected to look as such.

"If nothing's happened then why do you act all spacey?" Jenks accused.

"I've just got a lot on my mind lately," I murmured, removing the floral patterned oven mits Ivy and I had shopped for a couple of months ago. When I turned to look at Jenks, he still had the expectant look on his face, waiting for me to clue him in. With a sigh, I turned to Wayde. "Hey, do you think you could give us a sec—"

The air pressure in the church suddenly changed and I looked to find Ivy already standing in the doorway. Her eyes were jet black as she took a deep breath, sensing my apprehension, Jenks worry, and Wayde's amusement. Her nose crinkled cutely in confusion before she mentally shrugged it off and jerked into motion. She glided across the kitchen floor, coming to a stop beside me as she reached up towards the cabinets to get a cup. Her tight black shirt rose up along with her to reveal taut, creamy skin, the beginnings to definitions in her abs teasing my vision. I fidgeted where I stood, not knowing how to handle the way my heart rate picked up now that I knew what all of this meant. My gaze casted off to the side to find Glenn standing in the kitchen doorway staring at me. Alarmed, my face went blank, my own personal poker face as I turned away from him, pretending that I wasn't just ogling his girlfriend.

Ivy landed gracefully back on her feet with a cup in her hand. I looked up at her. The tension in her face and shoulders, trickling all down her body was as palpable as her inky black eyes, shocking in their soulful depths staring down at me. I swallowed thickly at the intimate way she leaned in closer. "Are you okay?" Ivy asked softly.

The tension in my deflated at the gentle timbre of her voice. She was like a lioness on the prowl, moving with sleek precision. But she knew how that put me on edge sometimes and combined with what she had scented on the air a few minutes ago, she wanted to make sure I was okay.

"I'm fine," I said with a light smile, glancing over at Glenn as he walked into the room. I looked back over to Ivy and she shrugged her shoulder, eyes dropping from what must have been a slightly accusatory look on my face. I look a deep breath, willing myself to calm down. Ivy wasn't mine. She could do whatever she wanted, and it wouldn't be fair for me to act like a jealous lover just because Glenn's over. He's also working on the case, after all.

"You're sure?" she asked, looking back up at me. "You smelled—"

"I know," I breathed, my mind catapulting to the intimacy behind that statement. It seemed that everything that used to creep me out about Ivy was now endearing her to me more than ever. "I'm okay, promise. Are you?" I continued, looking directly into her midnight eyes so that she would get what I meant.

"A little…tense," Ivy admitted quietly. "I'll be fine."

My gaze flicked to Glenn then back over to her. "Do you want to—later?" I asked, remembering that we had a very quiet and observing audience around.

A flicker of a smile pulled her lips upwards. "I'd like that." She pushed off the counter and walked over to the fridge. "I'll be home around midnight. Good for you?"

"Yeah, that's fine." I watched her svelte form, hip cocked out to hold the refrigerator door open as she poured herself a class of orange juice. She took a sip and released the door to quickly bypass Glenn and out of the kitchen. "Uh…hey, Glenn," I greeted, only now remembering that I had never acknowledged his presence verbally.

From his corner of the kitchen, Wayde grunted and pushed off the wall, giving a masculine head nod to Glenn in greeting before retreating to the back of the church. "Hey, Rachel," Glenn greeted as he walked further inside. His voice sounded a little strained, his motions uncharacteristically jerky as he walked to Ivy's chair and sat down.

"Rachel?" Ivy called from the hallway near our bedrooms, a question lilting her voice.

I bit back a smile at the child-like quality her voice held. "Yeah?"

"Shit," I heard her mutter and I suppressed a giggle as she walked back to the kitchen. "Have you seen my sword?" She stopped at the threshold, resting her arms on either side of the doorway, long, enviable straight hair framing her slender face as she regarded me evenly.

I took her in, breathing deeply through my nose to calm myself. "The last time you had it, you were threatening Wayde in the belfry for only coming down after we took showers.

A flicker of memory danced in her eyes as she pushed back onto her feet evenly and began walking away. "Thanks."

Silence prevailed in the kitchen, and I walked over to the table, taking a seat in order to keep from standing awkwardly. I didn't know how much Glenn knew, and I both wanted and didn't want to know.

I casted a glance in his direction to find him fiddling with Ivy's computer. A surge of jealousy flared through me before I quickly stomped it down. I didn't have a right to be jealous, damn it! But I was. He was sitting in her chair, on her computer and Jenks wasn't here shooing him away like he had been when I had sat in Ivy's chair.

"So…gonna bust a couple of heads?" I asked pleasantly in the lengthening silence.

He hesitated for a moment, then smiled, and I eased back into my seat at the sight of it. "Just a little. She had to chase down some thugs today on a side run and now she's all riled up."

A stab of heat pulsed through me at the thought of Ivy being 'riled up.' I inhaled quick breaths to calm myself as the sound of Ivy's scuffed boots became pronounced. She stopped at the kitchen doorway with her sword tucked neatly, dangerously at her side. Her head tilted as she looked from me to Glenn. "Ready to go?"

Glenn stood from her chair and walked across the kitchen towards her. "Yep, whenever you are."

They headed out when Ivy's footsteps stuttered to a stop. She turned around and looked towards the far counter, then over to me. Her eyes widened as her jaw dropped into an O shape as if she had just remembered something. "You cooked for me," she said, glancing over at the food.

Suddenly embarrassed, I stood slowly, self-consciously smoothing down a lock of red hair. "Ah, yeah. I did. I thought we could, you know, have dinner…together."

She blinked twice. Hard. And looked genuinely taken aback by the statement. "I'm sorry," she whispered, sounding achingly sincere, and I knew right then and there that she was well aware of my feelings for her. She didn't want me to feel like she was brushing me off to go hang out with Glenn. "I didn't know you were planning this. If I had, I would have—"

"It's okay," I said quickly, shaking my head to tell her to stop apologizing. It wasn't helping my embarrassment. "Don't worry about it. Have a good run."

Her mouth clamped shut and she nodded. "Okay. I'll be home a little later, and I'll eat it. All of it."

I flushed at both her words and the dark promise in her voice, knowing that she was talking about the chicken but being unable to help my reaction.

Ivy sucked in a huge breath and held it, not wanting to take in my scent because we both knew what affect it would have on her. Her gaze lingered for a moment before she turned away and followed Glenn out of the kitchen.

Sighing in the silence, I turned back to the chicken. I grabbed a knife and morosely cut myself a leg and placed it into a plate. Things were not looking up for me.

"Is that it?" A tentative voice asked behind me. Even though it was surprising to hear him speak that way, I knew immediately that it was Jenks behind me.

I shrugged my shoulder when he tried to land and he flew back to hover over it. "Is what it?" I asked, stalling.

I walked over to my side of the table and plopped down. There was a creak and I turned to find Wayde trying to sneakily walk towards the chicken. He caught my eye with a nervous laugh and a gesture towards the chicken. I rolled my eyes and nodded. "Only a leg, though. Save the rest for Ivy."

He shot me a dubious look as he picked up the knife. "She's going to eat all of this?"

I smiled. "You don't know Ivy. She's been packing it all away for as long as I've known her and hasn't gained a pound."

He then poured us both a glass of juice and sat down in the chair between mine and Ivy's side. Jenks swirled around us, landing on the table and Wayde and I both covered our food with grunts of protest at the sparkles that settled around us. "Don't play stupid, witch," he replied testily, picking up our old conversation. I shot him a look and his features softened as he walked closer on his small legs. "You're in love with her?"

My worried gaze shot to Wayde who was already looking at me, his face purposefully impassive, probably to keep me from freaking out. But it wasn't working because my heart rate was already beginning to pick up speed with the anxiety I was feeling.

I wasn't gay. At all.

But I was so in love with Ivy it hurt to look at her sometimes. But the thought of reaching out and touching and have her touch me the way my body was craving instilled a fear within me that rendered me immobile. Physically and mentally at a standstill as Ivy continued her life around me, probably waiting for me to figure my shit out if the kiss to the corner of my mouth and the invitation to talk last week were any indication.

"I…am," I said stiltedly, dropping my gaze to the chicken on the table. I sliced off a piece and forked it into my mouth, still staring holes through the table.

"So…are the two of you…?" Thankfully Wayde trailed off, alluding to mine and Ivy's relationship status without sending my heart into palpitations.

I shook my head, sipping at my drink like a thirsty fish. "We're not. I don't—I can't—"

"This sounds familiar," he muttered.

"Maybe it wouldn't if you weren't eavesdropping," I hissed back, transferring my anger over my situation with Ivy to Wayde in a single statement.

"Wait—you've talked to Ivy?" Jenks asked.

"More like stammered out some nonsensical bullshi—"

"Enough!" I shouted to the both of them, slamming my silverware on the table with a loud clang. Ivy was going to kill be if I scuffed the freshly polished wood.

Jenks and Wayde recoiled at my outburst, settling back and closing their mouths.

I pushed an errant lock of hair behind my ear in frustration, shifting in the chair in the uncomfortable silence. "I don't know what I'm doing," I admitted softly. I turned to Jenks, feeling glum. "Jenks, I don't know how to be with a woman. I'm straight. How the hell am I supposed to be with Ivy?"

From the corner of my eyes I saw Wayde drop his fork and look towards me. "Maybe it's not just the fact that Ivy's a woman," he said.

"What do you mean?" I whispered.

He shrugged a little, scratching at his beard. "Look, I don't really believe in soulmates and all that shit, but…I mean your auras chimed, right?"

I flushed hotly at the question and the casual way he asked it, as if he didn't know how intimate the question was. "How the hell did you know that?" I practically shrieked.

He smirked. "Jenks and I have been getting close lately."

I turned to swat at the annoying pixy and Jenks flew high with pixy dust flowing over the table. "Tink's panties, you stupid wolf! Can't you keep anything a secret?"

"Can _you_?" I shot back in irritation, glaring at Jenks who was several feet above us.

He wrung his tiny hands together nervously. "We were just having guy talk, Rach. Don't be mad."

"Guy talk does _not_ include mine and Ivy's relationship!"

"So, it's a relationship?" Wayde asked, relatively calmly considering the way I was screaming like a banshee.

I deflated at the question, sinking back into my seat. "In the typical boy/girl fashion? No—"

"Okay, see, that's the problem," he butt in. "You're not a guy and neither is Ivy."

"Thanks, Captain Obvious," I replied testily. "I think that's the whole problem here."

"I agree," he said simply, enjoying my ire a little too much. "You need to quit trying to fit this whole thing into black and white because I can tell you now it won't go there. This is a shade of gray."

"More like a shade of gay," Jenks muttered with a snicker.

I quickly shot out from my seat and darted a hand out to grasp him. He predictably flew out of my range, apologizing as he took to the ceiling. "Lay off it, Jenks!"

"Okay, okay, bad joke. I admit." He flew closer as I sat back down. "I'm sorry."

Wayde looked at the both of us expectantly. When I stared at him, he reddened a little and muttered, "Look, I was never one to believe in soulmates or anything…"

My breath caught as he trailed off, catching the implication of his statement. I didn't believe in soulmates either, but, "Our auras chimed," I breathed, remembering how I had driven myself crazy to try to find out what it had meant. I had learned from Peter years ago that vampires often temporarily 'stole' auras from whoever they were feeding from, but afterwards the auras returned to the owner. It was common. But what Ivy and I had shared the very first time she had bit me, what we would have shared over a week ago if Glenn hadn't intervened was so much more than that. It was a mingling, a combining of auras until they became one, until everything that was Ivy was me and vice versa. Until I was able to know everything she felt about me. It was the very definition of a mental climax and I shivered at the memory of the way we clutched desperately to each other, never wanting our union to sever.

"You think we're soulmates?" I whispered, a touch of wonder creeping into my voice. Were we? Were Ivy and I really soulmates, or some variation of that term that meant that despite my sexual orientation—I was hers? And despite whatever past and current relationships, blood and sex partners she had had—she was mine this entire time?

He shifted uncomfortably. "I don't know if I really believe in it," he quickly rushed out, not wanting me to question his masculinity for suggesting it. "But…what else could it be, you know?"

I nodded, not really listening. It felt like all the blood was rushing through my ears, like someone had stuffed cotton balls into them. I pushed back from the table, stood up and grabbed my cell phone from my pocket. "Thanks, Wayde," I mumbled as I walked towards the counter, dialing a number with my back to them.

Jenks flew to hover in front of me and my eyes crossed at his proximity. I backed up a step until I was able to focus on him. "Who you calling, Rach?"

"Nina," I whispered, pressing dial and placing the phone against my ear. I drowned out the ringing sound as Jenks kept talking to me.

"Why are you calling that crazy vamp?"

"Because she's a vamp," I deadpanned, feeling overwhelmed. "She'll know about the questions I have."

"You could just ask Ivy," he suggested softly.

He was right. I could ask her, but after having spent years inadvertently leading her on I didn't want to bother her and her possible relationship with Glenn until I could at least wrap my mind around what I was feeling.

The line clicked over and I took a deep breath as Nina spoke into the phone. "Hi, Rachel! I didn't know you'd actually use my personal line. Cool. Any news on the case?"

"No," I muttered, feeling like I was going to vomit. "Hi—and no, there's nothing new on the case. I was wondering if you were busy."

"I'm just getting out of the office," she said, and suddenly the click-clack of her probably new, designer heels became pronounced. "What can I do for you?"

"I was wondering if we could grab dinner and talk about the case." I glanced at the clock on the stove. It was ten at night. Ivy said she would be home around midnight. I could make this work.

"Hmm," she hummed into the phone, considering the offer. For the first time, I was _hoping_ to have dinner with a vampire outside of Ivy. I had questions, at least one she, or the undead vamp that normally projected himself through her, could answer. "Dinner sounds good," she finally said. "I could go for some pizza."

"Pizza sounds great," I agreed, not feeling hungry at all. "On me."

"Great! I'll meet you in a half-hour."

"Ah, and Nina?" I said into the phone.

"Yes, Rachel?"

I licked my lips nervously. What was I getting into? "I was wondering if you could get the, ah, other vamp to come as well?"

She was silent for a long moment. But when she finally spoke I could hear the subdued excitement in her voice. "I'll see what I can do, Rachel. I'll see you in a little while."

"Thanks. See you in a bit." I hung up the phone and braced my hands on the counter, hunching over it as I tried to steady my breathing. I was going to go have a 'friendly' lunch date after dark with both a living and undead vamp occupying the same body. How did I get myself into these situations?

I pushed from the counter several seconds later and ignored Jenks's and Wayde's gazes on me as I walked out of the kitchen and towards my room.

"Rachel, do you think this is a good idea?" Jenks asked, using my whole name to let me know he was deathly serious. "You're dealing with—"

"Vamps after dark, I know." I flashed a small smile. "I like with Ivy, remember? I'm used to it."

He followed behind me until I reached my bedroom door. I spun around and gave him a smile. "Just chill, Jenks. I'll be okay. Aren't I always?"

"That doesn't mean you should tempt fate, witch!" he shouted as I closed the door to my room. I quickly shucked my clothes and threw on some leathers, grabbing my jacket and my car keys.

When I opened my door Wayde was resting on the other side of the hallway, back against the wall beside Ivy's closed door. "I'm going with you," he said in a tone that brooked no argument.

I shrugged, for once not going to refute them as the thought of me going to hang out with two vamps in one body after dark started to sound stupider and stupider. He followed me as I walked through the sanctuary to the door leading outside.

From seemingly out of nowhere, Jenks flew down beside my ear, a faint buzzing sound announcing his presence. "Ivy said she'd be back by midnight."

"I know," I told him.

"If you're not back by the time she gets back, she's gonna be pissed, Rach."

I swallowed thickly at the thought of a six-foot, angry, sexy vampire named Ivy. It wouldn't bode well, but it excited me all the same. "I know."

And then he said something that stopped me in my tracks. "You're her blood supply now, Rach. Her sanity, her love. You've always been those things, but it's amplified now because she now has one of the two things she had always wanted from you the most."

The weight of his statement crashed on me like a ton of bricks and I felt tears prick my eyes at the importance of it all.

Ivy and me…we were soulmates.


	8. Chapter 8

**Title: **Hindsight, With a Sixty Percent Chance of About-face

**Pairing: **Rachel Morgan/Ivy Tamwood

**Rating: **PG-13

**Disclaimer: **I do not own these characters. Just having a little fun.

**Summary: **Ever since Ivy had told her she was going to move on, Rachel has been feeling a little out of sorts. But it was just a saying; Ivy wasn't going anywhere. Except, it wasn't, and she was.

**A/N:** Thank you for all your reviews! They're very much appreciated.

* * *

><p>Wayde and I slid into a booth in a dark corner at the back of Piscary's. The undead vamp was long gone, but one of the employees of the eatery had made himself manager and kept the place alive in order to continue making profit. Piscary's Pizzeria was the most famous pizza place in the Hollows; to shut it down would have been a crime against every race from vampires to witches to wolves.<p>

I got a few glances in my direction as I entered, but no one made a scene. Since the second death of Piscary and my previous shunning making headlines I fell into one of three categories for each vamp here tonight: respected, hated, or feared. And out of the three, none of them warranted any of the vampires wanting having contact with me. So, besides the occasional glares and head nods of respect, no one approached me.

Wayde was uncomfortable, but he was doing a good job of not letting it show. We were completely surrounded by vampires and it put the both of us on edge. But if we were going to make it out of here alive, we were going to need to play it cool.

"It's creepy as hell in here," Wayde told me from by my side. I was on the inside of the both, he had the outside. I reached to grab the small menu of alcoholic drinks at the table to feign disinterest in the environment I was in.

"You're going to have to speak lower than that when you insult the establishment if you don't want the vampires to hear," I muttered to him as I sank back in my seat. There was a low hum of pheromones all the vampires were unconsciously giving off now that the sun was down and I allowed it to wash over me, to further calm me and distract from the fact that this wasn't one of my better ideas.

He shifted nervously in his seat. "This was a stupid idea."

Though I was inclined to agree, I bristled at the accusation. "Did you have a better idea?" I hissed.

"Yeah, _talking_ to Ivy," he shot back.

"You don't know our history, Wayde." My agitation started to increase, and I took a deep breath, knowing that I was going to have a riot on my hands if I tipped off any of these vampires, starting a chain reaction that would end with Wayde and me dead. "You don't know us, okay? You've been here for a couple of months and that's it, but you don't get it—you don't get Ivy and me."

Wayde braced an arm on the table to better angle himself towards me, looking completely unsympathetic. "What don't I get?" he challenged. "That you're in love with her? That you're too scared to even kiss her because you don't wanna be gay?"

My mouth clacked shut at the succinct way he had put all of my insecurities out there. But I couldn't just go whining to Ivy about my issues with being with her. "She asked me to let her go," I whispered. "And she looks…happy with Glenn," I admitted. "I just can't charge in on her with all of these feelings if I never plan on acting on them."

"And how the hell is knowing the two of you are soulmates going to make a difference?"

I shrugged a shoulder with a small smile. "I don't know. Maybe it'll help, maybe it won't. But it'd be nice to know why I've felt so drawn to her all this time." I felt Wayde shift beside me and looked up to find an apprehensive looking waitress standing in front of the table. Plastering on a fake smile, I put our conversation to rest and focused on the young brunette in front of us. "Good evening," I greeted warmly, trying to assuage her worry that I was here.

She smiled politely but her eyes told a different story. "Hello, Ms. Morgan. May I get you anything?"

"Sprite, please. And a pepperoni pizza," I said, hoping Nina wasn't the all cheese type.

"Water," Wayde chimed in before the woman could even ask.

She flashed one more oh-so-super-fake-smile and sashayed away.

Just then the door at the front of the restaurant opened and I craned my neck to find Nina stepping inside. I breathed a sigh of relief. The sooner we could get this conversation underway, the sooner I could go home and spend time with Ivy. With that in mind, I grabbed my cell phone from the pocket of my jacket and checked the time. It was closing in on eleven. I had an hour to get back home or as Jenks said, I was going to be dealing with a hungry, pissed off vampire. I shuddered at the thought, feeling heat settle low in my gut at the thought of Ivy's midnight eyes staring predatorily into my own.

Nina winded through the tables to find us in the back. When she spotted me a large grin found its way onto her features as she slid into the booth in front of me and Wayde. "Hi, Rachel!" she greeted, rather loudly and both Wayde and I looked around to make sure no one was paying us attention. "It's good to see you. How've you been?"

"I've been pretty well," I said, meaning it. Despite this love triangle I seemed to have found myself in, I was doing well. I wasn't dead. That was always a plus.

"I'm completely starved," Nina lamented. "Have you ordered?"

I nodded, feeling like I was more babysitting than talking to a colleague. "I did, yes. Pepperoni. I hope you like that."

She grinned. "Pepperoni is great." She shifted in her seat, leaning back to get her elbows off the table as her spine straightened. "Now, what did you want to talk about—referring to the case?"

I took a deep breath, feeling nervous all of a sudden. My gaze darted around the restaurant to the table across from us. Then, I turned to Wayde. "Can you sit over there?" I asked as friendly as possible.

Wayde shot me a look, taking offense to the question. "Excuse me? How the hell can I be your body guard from all the way over there?"

"It's only a few feet away," I waved off. "Besides, what I have to talk to Nina about is personal."

Nina perked up at the question, looking perplexed. "Then this isn't about the case?" she asked suspiciously.

"I would be able to tell you exactly what it's about if Wayde would just sit at the table over there," I told her.

He glared at me, hating the idea. I valued him as a body guard, and more often than not, I made his job hard as hell. But I needed this space to talk about this without feeling completely embarrassed.

"I already know about your auras chiming," he hissed lowly, yet loud enough for Nina to hear.

Nina stared at us blankly for a long moment. Wayde and I stopped arguing long enough to notice her sitting completely still. Then she shuddered in her seat and a second later her eyes lowered, looking heavy lidded as her lips parted into a smirk that showed her fangs "Whose auras chimed?" Nina, or should I say the undead vamp in her, asked.

I scowled, still not liking the undead vamp. But I was eager to speak with him regardless.

"Rachel's and Ivy's," Wayde said, and I swatted him in the head.

"Can you _please_ leave?" I asked. "Seriously, Wayde, I'd be a lot more comfortable with you over there."

He rubbed at the back of his head as he stared at me. Rolling his eyes, he looked to the table across from us, grumbled something, then stood up. "If you try something," he began, looking over to Nina, "I won't hesitate to take you out."

It was a mostly empty threat considering we were surrounded by vampires, but the undead vamp at least had the decency to look chastened. "I would never try anything with Ms. Morgan, especially since it seems that Ms. Tamwood has already claimed her."

"I'm not—" I stopped short, not even knowing what I was refuting—being her blood partner? Her lover? I didn't know. Wayde walked off to the table in the silence, settling down and staring directly at us. Nina's smile widened further in the lengthening silence when I couldn't find a proper way to refute her claim.

"Was there something you wanted to talk about?" she purred. "Auras, perhaps?"

I flushed at the comment, ducking my head as the waitress came over. "Here you go." She placed the pizzas on the table and handed me my drink, looking confused as she eyed the empty spot beside me. Then she turned to Nina, looking even more confused. "Pardon," she began, turning towards me, "there was someone else here, right?"

"That'd be me," Wayde grumbled from behind her. The woman turned around to where Wayde was splayed across a booth, looking ticked. Still confused, the poor woman hesitantly walked over to him and handed him his drink and a plate.

"Can I get you guys anything else?" she asked.

I shook my head as I began grabbing a slice of pizza, and Nina waved her off.

When she walked away, I breathed a sigh of relief, taking a bite of delicious pizza before I began this conversation. Wayde walked over, snatching up a slice of pizza and glaring at me before returning to his table.

Nina, too, grabbed a gooey slice and took a bite, moaning wantonly at the taste. "This is _divine_," she groaned. Her throat worked as she swallowed the bite and grabbed a napkin, dabbing at the corners of her mouth. "Now, what is it you wish to talk about?"

I sat my pizza down, jaw clenching in anxiety. Aside from Ivy, Nina was the only one who I could talk to about this. But it still made me embarrassed. I clasped my hands, placing them on the table. "About a year ago," I began, "Ivy bit me for the first time. And when she did…our auras chimed," I whispered.

Nina nodded in understanding.

"And I just…I guess more than anything I want to know what that means." I licked my lips nervously, feeling foolish all of a sudden. "I mean, it's uncommon, right?"

Again, Nina nodded, lips twisting in thought for a moment. "It's not something I normally hear about," she admitted. "Not unheard of, just not…common." Her features pulled down into a contemplative frown before she asked me, "What does it feel like?"

Breath whooshed out of me at the implication behind the question. The undead vamp, someone who had been living for well over a hundred years if his influence over Nina was any indication had never personally felt what I was talking about.

Eyes wide, I swallowed thickly as I pulled on a year old memory that still haunted me at night, in my dreams. "It was like her aura was completely coating mine, protecting it."

"As opposed to stealing?" Nina cut in.

I nodded. "At first I felt my own aura reach out to her," I explained, lowering my voice in my excitement as I remembered we were still around an entire room full of vampires. "Then I felt her aura meet mine. And it wasn't like she was taking my aura to make her own; her aura covered mine, _protecting_ me." My breath released shakily as I was assaulted with all kinds of emotions swirling in my chest to make it ache. I really wished I was having this conversation with Ivy, but I had to keep these thoughts away from her until I was ready to act on them. She didn't deserve anything less.

"That is strange," Nina muttered thoughtfully. "Vampires normally take auras for their own, not protect someone else's."

"That's what I was told," I said, suddenly excited that this was so unheard of. "I was told that they take, not give and that's what leads me to believe Ivy and I are some form of special case."

Nina leveled me with a critical gaze. "What are you suggesting?" the undead vamp asked.

My breath hitched at the question. I was sitting here at Piscary's about to spill my heart out to the vamp that I had just met weeks ago and was currently working on a case with. I was crossing all kinds of lines. "I'm in love with Ivy," I admitted in a barely there whisper. Before Nina could speak, I rushed out with, "And I'm straight. Okay? I've never been with a woman before, never had the desire to before Ivy. And with the whole auras chiming thing, I was wondering if she and I were some kind of soulmates, or something." My cheeks flushed again in embarrassment and I heard Wayde snicker from his table. He could probably guess what I was revealing right now.

Nina's lips trembled in the threat of a smile. "You're…in love with Ivy?" she asked. "And you're just realizing this?" The amused smile broke through as she regarded me with dark eyes alight with amusement. "So, what you mean to say is that the two of you have never been…intimate at least once?"

"_No!_" I hissed, blushing at the question. If I had a dime for everyone who thought Ivy and I had bumped uglies at least once… "I wouldn't be here if I had already done…_that_."

"Forgive me, Ms. Morgan," Nina said with amusement lacing her voice. "But I had already assumed that the two of you had gone down that road at least once and that the tension between the two of you was because you wanted to do it again." She paused for a moment. "It had never occurred to me that the tension radiating off the two of you was because you _hadn't_ done it yet."

"Yeah, well, we _haven't_." _But I wanted to_, I thought to myself with a sigh. "But you're right about the…tension thing," I admitted. "It's always been there, and…it's not one sided. Which is why I want to know."

Nina was quiet for a long moment. I picked up my pizza, taking a bite and thinking over the past several years I had known Ivy. We had found ourselves in more compromising positions than I could even count and it wasn't simply because she was a vampire with weird instincts. I could—begrudgingly—admit that a lot of those occurrences were my fault. I had been seducing her for years and I had been so blind to it all this time. I didn't want to admit it, admit that I wanted her to bite me, kiss me, pin me to hard surfaces. I liked the danger of living with a vampire, but at some point I had stopped liking, _loving_ the danger and started _loving_ Ivy. Ivy, the vampire, and, scarily, Ivy, the woman.

"Vampires don't typically believe in a word like soulmates," Nina said quietly after a long moment. "I do not know the ins and outs of yours and Ivy's relationship, but from what I have seen…she respects you a great deal. And that, Ms. Morgan, is possibly the most important thing a vampire can extend their mate."

I swallowed thickly at the term 'mate' that Nina used so heavily. It felt like a word of permanence, like this was it. From here on out, it was me and Ivy, and that was it.

"We can love, sure," Nina continued. "We can love many times, and many ways." Her lips pulled into a lascivious grin until her fangs showed. "But without respect, without loyalty, our love is next to nothing, our love will hurt. But Ivy respects you and in the end that keeps her from hurting you, that keeps her _with_ you." Her head tilted as she eyed me strangely. "You're the dominant, aren't you?"

I blushed, averting my eyes to the pizza, and Nina laughed richly. "I'll take that as a yes."

"How do you know?" I asked, meeting her eyes.

A delicate shoulder shrugged. "I've met many like Ivy. If you weren't the dominant she would have destroyed you long ago."

I shuddered at the thought.

"But again, she respects you, and that keeps her from destroying what she loves the most. Because in the end, destroying you would destroy her, too."

"She believes I'm the one person who can save her…" I whispered, feeling my chest tighten. There had been times when Piscary had tried to manipulate Ivy into harming me and it had hurt her deeply—the mere thought of causing me harm. I was her sanity. She had told me that many times and it was both a wonderful sentiment, and a heavy burden. But one that I carried with pride because if I was Ivy's sanity then she was possibly the single most reason I was still alive today.

"She lives for you," Nina guessed astutely from scenting my emotions as her nostrils flared. "And you don't like it."

I forced out a bitter laugh. "Look at me. Would you trust me with your sanity, your life?"

"If I loved you as much as I think Ivy does, I would have no choice. Ivy loves you more than anything else in this world. So, yes, you are her sanity and her life."

"And I love her just the same," I said. "I've never loved a woman—" I threw my hands up in exasperation. "Hell, I've never loved _anyone_, man or woman as much as I love Ivy."

Nina smiled. "Which is why you think you're soulmates."

I nodded, wiping at my eye where I felt tears forming. "What else could it be? She's a freaking _woman_. One who has threatened my life on more than several occasions over the past few years and yet I still remained, still baited her further because I couldn't admit to myself that I _wanted_ her in _every_ sense of that word." My lips trembled as I furiously wiped away tears. "What else could this possibly _be_?"

Nina's eyes softened as she looked at me. "I've always admired young love," the undead vampire said to me. "So confusing, taxing, yet utterly rewarding." Her lips pulled into smile a rare, genuine smile as she regarded me. "If she is indeed the only woman you've ever loved, Ms. Morgan, and the person you've loved most in this world, and you can't seem to go without her—"

"I can't," I said as I shook my head at the mere thought of living without Ivy.

Her smile gentled. "If all of this is true, if the two of you are so emotionally invested in each other, and combined with the fact that you and Ivy _share_ auras, I would be inclined to agree with your assessment. Granted, vampires don't have a word like 'soulmate' in our vocabulary, for obvious reasons. The closest I can even come to that word would be a scion."

My eyes widened at that word, remembering Ivy's proposal to make me her scion almost three years ago. Nick, my ex-boyfriend, had told me that what Ivy had been offering had been a life-long commitment. It was the highest honor, being a scion to a vampire, and Ivy had extended that to me before I even knew that her feelings for me were more than her simply wanting to get me into bed. She had loved me this whole time. More tears crowded the corner of my eyes at the thought as the ache in my chest began to increase. Even back then she had known that she was going to love me forever.

"I've never felt this way about anyone," I said softly, feeling like that had been my mantra all night.

Nina offered a toothy, teasing grin. "And you never will again, Ms. Morgan." 

* * *

><p>My fingers trembled in their excitement as I tried and failed to jam the key into the key hole. Thoughts of touching Ivy swirled in my mind unbridled, warm and uninhibited as I finally allowed myself to bask in the way I felt for her. I was still nervous; she was still going to have to walk me through it if she wanted to, but I was dying to tell her how I felt. Or <em>show<em> her even, and I felt something hot pulse through me at the thought.

I finally managed to get my key into the door and unlocked it, opening it and slipping inside. Wayde rushed inside like a puppy afraid of the cold, shrugging out of his jacket as I turned to lock the door.

"Let's never do that agai—_whoa_!"

I heard him shout loudly, followed by a loud thump far off and turned around to find Ivy standing before me. Her posture was crouched, poised for attack, and I casted a glance behind her to find Wayde halfway across the room, struggling to sit up.

"Ivy, what the hell?" I shouted, not being able to comprehend what was going on, especially in my love induced haze. It had been a good day, I had had a great night, and now that I had come home, Ivy was throwing people across the sanctuary.

Her face pulled back into a sneer, her nose crinkling as her nostrils flared, and her lips pulled back until her sharp fangs were bared to me.

Oh, shit.


	9. Chapter 9

**Title: **Hindsight, With a Sixty Percent Chance of About-face

**Pairing: **Rachel Morgan/Ivy Tamwood

**Rating: **PG-13

**Disclaimer: **I do not own these characters. Just having a little fun.

**Summary: **Ever since Ivy had told her she was going to move on, Rachel has been feeling a little out of sorts. But it was just a saying; Ivy wasn't going anywhere. Except, it wasn't, and she was. 

* * *

><p>She lunged at me quickly and the next thing I knew my back was against the door and Ivy was pressed tightly against me. A surprised breath wheezed out of me. She and I hadn't sparred together in months and it seemed that I had completely lost what little edge I had had. Either that or my subconscious just really wanted to be pinned to a hard surface by what was looking to be an irate Ivy Tamwood.<p>

My eyes strayed past of what little of Ivy's head I could see as I saw Wayde hop up and head towards us. "No!" I urged, eyes widening as he quickly approached. The last thing I needed was Wayde dying in the sanctuary because he decided to go toe to toe with Ivy.

He hesitated, then stopped once he realized she wasn't really attacking me. She was sniffing me, and not liking what she smelled if the grunt of disgust I just heard come from her was any indication. "I got this, Wayde. Just go to bed, please," I pleaded, more so for his life than anything. If he actually thought he stood a chance against Ivy then I was starting to question his intelligence.

Still looking anxious, he took a step forward. "Are you sure?" he asked.

Bad move.

As soon as the floorboard creaked under his weight, Ivy swiveled around with a growl of annoyance, taking a protective, possessive stance in front of me.

"I'm sure!" I said. "Just go! We're fine!"

Against my better judgement, I reached out and loosely grabbed Ivy's arm, not enough to make her feel trapped, but enough to get her to focus on the task at hand. Less than a second later her midnight eyes filled with fire bored into me. From behind her, I saw Wayde slink off and breathed a sigh of relief.

But it was short lived.

Both hands suddenly plastered on the door and entire body plastered to me, Ivy dipped her head until her nose was running along my throat. She buried her face into my neck and took a deep breath. I shuddered and melted into the door as her breath enflamed my demon scar. I didn't know what the hell was going on. But Ivy had never actually bitten me against my will and I trusted her to ask if she actually wanted to.

She pulled back with a growl that resonated deep in my groin. "Did she bite you?" Ivy asked gruffly.

Realization dawned on me instantly. Vampires were extremely territorial, Ivy specifically and probably especially so now that we were sharing blood. Though I loathed the idea of being possessed, I could recognize that ultimately what Ivy wanted was reassurance that I wasn't going anywhere. "She didn't bite me," I soothed.

Her hand rose to roughly yank the collar of my shirt lower and she nosed a trail across my collarbone. A soft moan escaped me at the feel of her lips brushing over me, and suddenly I wanted to feel them on me with more purpose. "I can smell her on you."

The tone of her voice was accusatory and before I was able to utter another word, she pulled me toward her rigid body, wrapping her arms tightly around me to the point of discomfort. She nipped at my neck with purpose and I knew the next bite was going to break skin.

"Ivy, wait," I whispered, voice soft and firm all at once. She stopped moving and breathing all together but she was still here, something that wouldn't have been the case if I had told her to stop. I would have been standing here alone and she probably would have fled the church. I didn't want her to leave. I didn't even want her to let me go; I just needed her to calm down.

After a moment of her standing rigidly against me, I reached out to curl my arms around her waist. She gasped softly in surprise, face still buried into my neck like a frightened little girl as I pulled her closer. My hands splayed across her back, rubbing lean muscles until they loosened and Ivy sagged against me.

Her breathing evened out against me, warm puffs of air brushing against my neck and I shivered as my arms tightened around her. This felt right. I had been resisting all of my feelings for Ivy for years—to finally give in to them and hold her against me made my chest feel warm.

"I _give_ you this, Ivy," I said softly. "There is no reason you should have to take it like this."

She shuddered against me with a whimper, burying her face further into my neck. Her hold on me slackened the barest hint until I could breathe without labored effort. I took a deep breath, rubbing a hand up her back and burying it into her hair. Her breath was warm against my neck, steady. She was gaining control again and as long as I didn't make any sudden movements, and Jenks and Wayde didn't come barging in, we were going to be alright. Speaking of Jenks…

"Ivy?" I prompted, still massaging the back of her neck.

She hummed against me.

"Where's Jenks?"

Ivy stiffened at the question and I held her tighter so she wouldn't pull away, but my curiosity was morphing into anxiety.

Puffing out a semi-annoyed breath like this was the absolute last thing she wanted to talk about, she answered me. "I told him to get lost," she said softly. "Or I was going to kill him."

It was an empty threat—Ivy and Jenks had threatened each other's lives several times over the years, but I was normally always there to diffuse the tension. I wasn't here when they got into whatever argument that had prompted Ivy to threaten him and my eyes wandered behind her as I wondered if he was okay.

"You didn't…hurt him, did you, Ivy?"

Her lips skimmed my neck and my head tipped back against the door, a not so subtle hint to her that I wanted it. Though the 'it' in question, she may not know—whether I wanted her to bite me or kiss me. And with a dizzy head, I realized I wanted both. Now. Right now. "No," she breathed against me.

She continued to mold her lips to me, not quite kissing as they traveled up my neck, under my chin and across my cheek. When she reached the corner of my mouth like she had a week ago, she pulled back slightly. I felt her breath against the corner of my mouth and all it would take was for me to turn my head…

Hand tightening on the back of her neck in anxiety, I turned, dragging my eyes up from the cleavage shown in her mostly unbuttoned polo shirt, over her smooth, pale throat, to her lips where my gaze hung. Her lips were pink, plump, and they looked hungry, lonely, set into a pout as if the need to kiss me just made Ivy sad.

Reluctantly my eyes left her lips to find Ivy's own eyes, black as sin and staring at me intently. She had gone completely still in my arms, barely breathing as she stared at me, her hungry gaze contrasting with her blank features.

"Ivy," I whispered, heart pounding in my chest. I could feel a trickle of heat travel down my body and my eyes fluttered as something clenched white hot inside of me.

Ivy took a deep breath at my reaction, those beautiful eyes widening. Her head tilted as she eyed me, almost curiously. "You're scared and…aroused," she breathed, sounding like she was in awe.

I nodded quickly. "I'm terrified." My hold tightened around her to bring her closer around the same time Ivy stiffened. She pulled as far back away from me as she could without actually breaking the hold I had on her. "What's wrong, Ivy?" I asked.

She stared at me for a long moment, grief slowly morphing her features into pained. "Even after all this time you're still…" she trailed off sadly, shaking her head. "No."

"Ivy, wha—"

She was already halfway through the sanctuary before I could even get a word out.

Stunned for a moment, I quickly gathered by bearings and followed behind her as fast as I could, throwing my jacket off in an attempt to keep it from slowing me down. She was miles ahead of me though, and my walk turned into a light job. By the time I made it to her door it was already shut tight.

I stood outside of her door, looking confused and a little hurt. This wasn't supposed to be difficult. I was supposed to just come in, share blood with Ivy, profess my love, and hopefully kiss her, or something. But I had been in this house for over half an hour and I hadn't even gotten a welcome home.

I reached out to lightly run my fingers across the door as I bit my lip, contemplating my next move. Finally, I steeled my resolve. "You had better be in the belfry, Wayde!" I shouted loudly enough for him to hear, then mentally chastised myself for the possibility of haven woken up an entire pixy clan. Once the coast was clear, I reached for the doorknob, turning it slowly.

Predictably Ivy's door was unlocked. I didn't doubt that she left because she wanted space, but I knew a test when I saw one, especially after living with her for so many years. _Everything_ was a test. Right now she was testing to see if I cared enough to chase after her the way she had fruitlessly spent years chasing after me. Well, now her tree bore fruit, and it was ripe and for the picking. I just hoped Ivy wasn't too tired of a farmer to let this harvest go.

I really needed to stop with this analogy.

I opened the door to her room to find it dimly lit. There was a lamp in the corner that she had thrown a scarf over to cast a soft pink hue over the room, and I felt welcomed, even if I wasn't, as I closed the door behind me. When she looked up at me from where she had her head in her hands, perched atop her bed, I locked the door in a show that I trusted her. Probably stupid on my part, but we were soon going to find out.

"Ivy?" I voiced softly as I slowly made my way to her.

She shot up from the bed, looking like a scorned lover as her shoulders pulled taut in her outrage. "You don't change!" she accused.

I abruptly stopped my advance on her at her outburst. Flustered all of a sudden, I looked wildly around the room as if the response to her vague shout was somewhere in the shadows. "What?" I asked, almost incredulously considering what I had gone through tonight. "_What_ are you talking about, Ivy?"

"You always do this, Rachel," Ivy told me, advancing on me with quickness that bordered on vampire speed until she was directly in front of me. The ire shining clearly in her eyes gave way to weariness, defeat, and I would have much preferred her anger than this. "You _always_ do this to me," she lamented sadly. She brought up her hand, curling it and running the backs of her fingers down my bare arm. Goosebumps rose in their wake, and I shivered as she looked me directly in the eye. "I turn you on," Ivy told me. "I know I do. I always have and you've always resisted. And you're _always_ scared."

"Ivy, I—"

"And last week I thought—" She chuckled bitterly, shaking her head to herself as her arm dropped back to her side. I felt cold all of a sudden and wanted nothing more than to throw myself at her and wrap around her body heat. "I thought you were actually changing. You know, _learning_." Her tongue darted out to languidly travel along her lower lip and she watched me watch it until she curled it back into her mouth. "I mean, you _humped_ me on my bike on the way to the crime scene, Rachel. Who does that?"

"Ivy—" I pleaded, wanting a chance to talk, but she cut me off.

"So, I thought that you wanted to try…us, finally. And I gave you the time you needed." She looked at me sadly. "I was never going to push you. But in there," she said as her eyes flickered towards the door, indicating the sanctuary, "you looked like you wanted me to kiss you. And I was going to. Dear heart, I've wanted to kiss you so badly since the night you couldn't stop squirming on my bike."

"Ivy," I moaned, both at her words and the fact that a rush of pheromones poured off of her in waves as we both thought back to that night.

The low, needy tone of my voice stopped her completely as her nostrils flared, taking in my scent. "I know how you feel about me," Ivy said morosely. "Hell, _I_ knew before you did." She took a threatening step closer, looking sleek and predatory under her black clothing as her hips swayed. "For years I could smell your arousal, Rachel. It's teased me since before I even pinned you to that damn couch three years ago."

I should have been denying this, the fact that she was alluding to even during our days with the I.S. she could still smell my arousal for her. I should have been calling her a liar, but I couldn't help but fidget before her. My pulse seemed to quicken and call out to her to come even closer.

"I can smell you right now," Ivy rasped. Her head tilted as she regarded me. "You're already wet. What are you thinking about, Rachel?"

I felt myself flood at the uncharacteristic way she called me out on my own arousal. _Kissing_ _you_, I answered in my head as my gaze dropped down to her lips. They were practically eye level, and as she closed her teeth around her plump bottom lip, something hot clenched inside of me. Ivy purred, scenting the fresh wave of my arousal.

I wanted to kiss her. I wanted to be tangled in bed sheets with her like I had fantasized about more times than I could count. Ivy's sleepy gaze regarding me from under a mound of blankets with love shining in her eyes. Damn it, I just wanted her to _love_ me.

Suddenly she stiffened before me, a guarded look overcoming her heated gaze. "You still smell—"

"Ivy, I'm anxious," I rushed out in a breath. "About _this_." I gestured between the two of us. "I'm not afraid of you, Ivy. I'm afraid of trying this because I don't know what I'm doing. And I _hate_ that I don't know." I shrugged a shoulder, almost helplessly as Ivy's eyes slowly widened in understanding. "Ivy, I love you. Truly, but you're a woman, and…I don't know—I mean, I know the logistics of it, but I—this is different for me."

"You're not scared of me?" Ivy asked quietly, and I vehemently shook my head.

"If you had given me the chance to talk, I would have told you that," I couldn't help but grumble. I dared to take a step closer, completely in her personal space. "Ivy, I'm scared of _being_ with you. _But_," I quickly added, "I want to be with you. I love you…so much more than I ever thought I could. I'm _in_ love with you, Ivy. And it scares me. But I—you're right," I told her with a small blush. "You do turn me on."

"I always have," Ivy asserted, making me confess the fact that even when I was terrified of her, even back to the first time she pinned me on the couch in the living room—I was aroused by her this entire time.

With a tight swallow, I quietly admitted, "You have. All this time."

I felt like a total spaz as I babbled on to her, then Ivy's eyes filled with tears that scared the crap out of me. I opened my mouth to apologize, but she wrapped her arms around me, squeezing air out of me like I was a tube full of toothpaste. Though I didn't know what it meant, I melted in her embrace, glad that she wasn't yelling at me anymore.

"Silly, stupid witch," Ivy whispered affectionately in my ear, molding all of her curves into mine. It was a lover's embrace, I realized deliriously. She nuzzled my ear with the tip of her nose and a purr rumbling in her chest. Then, as if something had just occurred to her, she stopped—still holding me close with her lips against my ear. "What was the whole date with Nina about, then?"

Her voice had lost its accusatory edge now that she was able to get her hands on me, hold me possessively know that her feelings were tentatively being reciprocated. "It wasn't a _date_ date," I told her, then sighed, thinking the truth would set me free.

Or get me sweet Ivy kisses, whichever.

"We talked about you," I continued. "I was freaking out, trying to figure how I could feel this way about you."

"Because I'm a woman," Ivy said, finally catching on.

I nodded against her shoulder, wrapping my arms fully around her waist. My chest rose and fell with quick breaths as I contemplated what I was about to say. "Ivy, I—I think we're soulmates," I whispered, somewhat self-consciously as I burrowed further into her shoulder.

Ivy went incredibly still.

It was always unnerving when she did that.

She pulled back, eyes brimming with tears that somehow made her look even more beautiful as she stared down at me. "Soulmates?" she breathed. "You—really?"

I nodded, not knowing whether her reaction was a good thing or not. "The undead vamp in Nina said that vampires don't believe in soulmates for…obvious reasons."

Her gaze darkened imperceptibly. Vampires didn't like to speak of their souls, Ivy especially. It was a sensitive topic for her and she still held out hope that I would be able to save her soul one day. For both of our sakes, I hoped so, too.

"He said that the closest word he could come to soulmate was 'scion'," I continued.

Understanding dawned on her as her lips parted slightly. "You already told me no, though," she said sadly, and I really wished I could let go of my squeamish tendencies of needing complete control of myself to make Ivy happy, to be her scion. Be that as it may, though…I doubted that I'd ever make it to that point. I trusted her, completely. It was just my own issue that kept me from making that commitment.

"I did," I said carefully, trying not to turn this love declaration into a rejection. "But I—Ivy, I've just missed you," I told her sincerely. "When you told me to let you move on, I started to miss you immediately. I missed you hunting me, despite the fact that you would never admit that you were and despite the fact that it made me uneasy. I missed the possibility of you biting me, the possibility of you _kissing_ me."

Her nostrils flared as she breathed deeply, tightening her hold around me. There wasn't even a hint of brown around her eyes, but I knew it was more because of the intense emotions that I was giving off and not because she was losing control again.

"I missed the possibility of you ever touching me again." I shifted anxiously where I stood and Ivy leaned forward, warm lips pressing reassurance against my forehead. I leaned more heavily into her, staring at her neck and collarbone as I continued. "And then…it got worse," I admitted. "I started missing your touch, because that was all you had really taken away. You still talked to me the same, you still protected me, the only thing that was really missing was the way you would touch me sometimes and I missed it, Ivy. I really did."

She hummed in understanding, lips still firmly pressed to my forehead.

"Then somewhere along the way…I had also began to miss the opportunities you had extended to me time and time again to touch you back. I _wanted_ to touch you, and I wanted you to touch me. That's why…" I licked my lips, feeling my face warm over as I thought back to how Ivy and I had been two seconds away from getting it on weeks ago when we had shared blood for the first time in over a year. "That's why when you bit me a couple of weeks ago, and when your hand moved up my stomach—" Ivy tensed, and I shook my head as I rubbed my hands up and down her back, silently reassuring her that she didn't need to feel weird about it, that I was acting just as weird that day. "That's why I didn't stop you," I told her. "I didn't want you to stop, even though at the time I didn't really know what the hell I was doing. But I had finally felt close to you again after months of feeling like there was this huge rift between us. I wanted it, Ivy, and I still do." I bit my lip. "I'm just scared. But I _do_ want you."

Ivy pulled back to stared down at me, biting her lip in apprehension. "I wasn't sure whether or not you liked it—when I almost touched you that day," she clarified. "You didn't say anything about it, so I assumed—"

I shook my head, red curls brushing the side of my face as I smiled up at her. She looked so adorably cautious that it was both endearing and heartbreaking. My heart pounded beneath my breast in anxiety, the question of whether or not we could kiss right now on the tip of my tongue. But to the trained eye it was obvious that Ivy was still tense, the lines of her body drawn wire tight.

My eyes flickered to the clock on her nightstand to notice that it was well past midnight. "Ivy," I lamented. "You still haven't fed?"

Her hands roamed the expanse of my back with eager fingers as she shook her head.

My mind reeled at the amount of trust and devotion I saw in her gaze, as if I was the only person in the world who could feed her, as if she'd rather starve than to ask anyone else, even _Glenn_ to give her blood. Without much thought, only overwhelming emotion for the vampire in her staring hungrily at me, I pulled away from Ivy and climbed atop her bed. Motions slightly jerky with nerves, I spun to lie back against her pillows. The scent of spice and incense washed over me, calming me somewhat. This was just Ivy, my partner in so many ways now, and I trusted her with me.

Slowly so as not to scare me, Ivy approached the side of the bed. My gaze dipped down to her chest that began to rise and fall with more exaggeration. She was getting turned on, and the fact that I still had that effect on her made my heart swell.

"Come here, Ivy," I murmured, patting the space beside me.

Her knee hit the mattress and I swallowed thickly as she descended onto the bed, hovering over me. Her gaze washed over my face, then down my neck, watching it work. She placed one arm on the other side of me and draped herself atop me. I inhaled sharply at the searing heat from her body that seeped into mine. She fit so perfectly on top of me, nuzzling my neck, licking like a starved kitten.

My head tipped back as I stared up at her ceiling, hands roving all along her back. She was so lean with sleek muscles that belied strength that I shuddered to think about.

"You give me this?" Ivy breathed, voice husky from hunger and arousal. She couldn't wait any longer, couldn't draw it out. She was strung up wire tight and I was the only one she would allow to sate her hunger until she was calm once more.

"I do, Ivy," I told her, moaning as she unconsciously shifted against me. "You know I do."

Her moan was muffled into my skin, and the next thing I felt was a sharp pain in my neck followed by overwhelming pleasure as the vamp saliva immediately kicked in.

"Ivy," I whined, caught off guard as I always was when we ended up like this.

She moaned her own enjoyment as she continued to pull from me. If it were possible, her fangs slipped further into me as Ivy moved to get closer. Her legs settled intimately between and I sighed when she brushed against me.

I lifted a hand to bury in her hair, grounding myself as I began to feel my aura slip from me. I could understand how non-vamps could find this scary. I probably would have to if I had no understanding, if Ivy's aura more than met mine halfway every single time. I could already feel it reaching for me, warm and pure, so very innocent.

Ivy pulled away and I whimpered piteously. "Ivy, don't stop," I pleaded, gripping the back of her hair.

"Rachel, I—_fuck_," she moaned into my neck. I clenched my thighs together around hers at the passion that lay behind that word. She licked up my neck. "You smell so good." She didn't even give me a chance to respond before she was sinking her teeth into me again and pulling.

My body pulled taut as our auras picked right back up where they left off, as if nothing had happened. I untangled our legs and wrapped mine around her in an attempt to be even closer. Her touch was feather light, curling a hand around my elbow and I groaned as Ivy bucked into me, looking for pressure that wasn't there.

Our auras merged just the tiniest bit more until they became one and my eyes clamped shut as a cascade of emotions rolled over me. _Ivy_, I realized immediately. I could feel everything, her overwhelming need for me to accept her for the woman and vampire she was. Her need to protect me, even risk her life for me, and the soul shattering love and _respect_ that had been growing within her this entire time.

When she sighed languidly against me, I knew she could feel my love for her, too. She could feel that after all these years I could finally match every raw emotion she felt for me. I _needed_ her, desperately. She could feel it, and I could feel happiness wash through me—Ivy's happiness.

"Ivy," I sobbed when she pulled out. With a gasp, she collapsed on top of me and I wrapped her in my arms.


	10. Chapter 10

**Title: **Hindsight, With a Sixty Percent Chance of About-face

**Pairing: **Rachel Morgan/Ivy Tamwood

**Rating: **PG-13

**Disclaimer: **I do not own these characters. Just having a little fun.

**Summary: **Ever since Ivy had told her she was going to move on, Rachel has been feeling a little out of sorts. But it was just a saying; Ivy wasn't going anywhere. Except, it wasn't, and she was. 

* * *

><p>I woke with a start to find myself alone.<p>

In my own bed.

Bewildered, I dragged my blankets higher up my body for warmth as my sleep blurry eyes surveyed my room. There were no signs of Ivy. I wracked my brain for answers, trying not to cry as I felt tears sting my eyes. I had told her explicitly that I loved and wanted her, leaving now room for misinterpretation, and she had expressed the same sentiment. We had shared blood, and after reaffirming my feelings for Ivy through our shared bond when our auras chimed, we had spent what I assumed the rest of the night cuddling in silence, intertwined as intimately as we dared until I feel asleep shortly after.

Which was why I was so confused to wake up alone in my own bed, wondering why Ivy had put me back in my room after we had shared last night together. _Maybe she really is over you_, I thought to myself morosely. Had she merely been entertaining my word vomit last night to keep me from embarrassing myself like the saint she was? Had she relegated me to my own bed last night as a passive way to letting me know that she had really moved on, that she was happy with Glenn, and that I should let all of this go?

Frustrated tears crowded my eyes as I thought of the way Ivy touched me last night, gentle fingers caressing my arm to prove her point—that she turned me on. Why the hell had she been toying with me, then? She had told me that she had wanted to kiss me for over a week now, and I wake up sleeping in my own bed? It didn't make any sense. I didn't understand any of it, but all of it was beginning to piss me off as I flung back the covers from my bed, finding myself dressed in the same clothes I had worn last night. I stalked out of my room, slamming the door loudly behind me loud enough for Ivy to hear if she was still in the house. I flicked the light on in the bathroom, slamming that door as well before freshening up.

When I was presentable in changed clothes, simple household lounge flannel pants and a clean camisole, I stalked towards the kitchen to find Ivy, hovering over the coffee pot.

I froze by the doorway, caught between angry at having been put into my own bed last night and all the things it could mean, and…completely in love with the woman before me in a black silk robe that barely passed mid-thigh, hair framing her face.

I stood and watched her press the necessary buttons, roiling emotions making my stomach hurt.

"Want some coffee?" Ivy asked softly.

I gave a start, not having known she knew I was here. But after living with her so long I should have known. "No," I found myself saying, though I really did.

Ivy's head popped up to look over at me, hair slightly wavy from where she had slept on it all night. "Are you sure?"

I walked further into the kitchen, grabbing a pot from a cabinet and placing it on the stove. "I'm sure," I replied stiffly.

From my peripheral I saw Ivy turn towards me, and her movements were so unconsciously predatory that I knew, a few years ago, seeing her do that would have scared the crap out of me. It amazed me how far I had come as I ignored the way she was watching me as I turned a stove cap on and walked towards the refrigerator. I bent down to grab a carton of eggs.

"You're angry," Ivy declared factually.

I closed the refrigerator door with a little more force than necessary, but with decidedly less force than I was using about ten minutes ago when I was slamming doors all around the house. The fact that she was so keen on my emotions was starting to become really endearing though I was upset with her.

I didn't respond as I walked back over to the stove.

"With me," Ivy continued, the tone of her voice sounding more inquisitive than sure, as if she wasn't sure she was reading me right.

I ignored her, cracking eggs into the pan as my breathing began to feel labored, chest heavy. How could she possibly stand here talking to be as if she hadn't basically rejected me without saying it?

I walked to the counters adjacent to the wall to grab a plate. When I turned around, Ivy was there, grabbing the plate from my hand in my surprise and placing it against the counter. She backed me up to the wall, and I felt anger boil through me at the way she treated me like I was some insignificant plaything.

"What's wrong with you?" Ivy asked, searching my eyes.

There was so much concern in her eyes that it caused my own eyes to well at the thought that I had missed out on all of this devotion and affection, that now all she saw me as was a friend and no longer a potential lover. I sniffed, looking away from her as I tried to push past her. "Nothing," I mumbled.

She grabbed my arm, yanking me back to the wall, pinning me with the intensity of her stare alone. She wasn't pulling an aura, but her focus on me kept me in place just the same. "Why are you upset with me?" she asked instead. Her gaze darted around my face, and my gaze dipped to her throat as a tight swallow bounced down. "Do you regret last night?" she whispered.

Surprised, I gawked at her. "_You_ were the one who regretted it!" I yelled back before I could keep my emotions in check.

Ivy recoiled, looking as if I had slapped her as her horror stricken features elongated her oval face. "I didn't," Ivy murmured. "Rachel, how could you think that?"

"I woke up alone in my own bed!" I continued, feeling hysterical as my eyes welled with big, fat tears that made me want to hide away in my room until they were gone and I could have this conversation with her without looking weak. Be that as it may, my frustrations at myself or waiting so long and at Ivy for leaving me alone mounted until it all poured out. "The last thing I remembered was holding you on your bed, and then I wake up this afternoon and I'm in my own damn bed, Ivy!"

Her eyes widened and she blinked them quickly, twice, before her head tilted. Then a low, too-sensual-for-noon chuckle slithered from her as she quirked an eyebrow. "You're upset because I took you back to your room?"

I suddenly felt like a petulant child, feeling the urge to stomp my foot and demand answers. Instead I kept my mouth shut, not liking the amused glint in Ivy's darkening eyes.

"Do you know _why_ I took you back to your room, Rachel?" Ivy breathed.

She was a lot closer now than she was moments before, and despite my upset, I found myself swaying towards her until we were barely touching. Every time she inhaled her breasts brushed against my more modest ones and it took everything I had to not close my eyes and luxuriate in the small sparks of electrical sparks that flowed through me.

"_Why_?" I asked, somewhat defiantly, and I suspected Ivy liked it if the way her eyes flashed were any indication. I was trying to hold onto my anger, but it was proving difficult as I stared into her eyes with only a thin ring of black around them, the increasing rise and fall of her chest brushing mind. Was…was Ivy getting turned on?

She dragged her tongue over her lower lip as she continued to stare at me. "Are you sure you want to know?"

"Yeah," I replied airily, the last of my anger melting away into curiosity and my own arousal as I watched how it clearly swirled just as strong in Ivy's eyes.

"I woke up last night to find you underneath me," Ivy breathed, inching closer. My gaze rose, heading tipped back against the wall to keep our eyes locked. "Your shirt had ridden up and all I saw was smooth skin. Rachel, I've wanted you for years, and I wanted to do _so_ _many_ things to you last night." Goosebumps rose along my skin as I wondered what were the so many things Ivy wanted to do to me. "I had to get you back to your room," Ivy finished. "Before I did something you weren't ready for."

Surprised by her yet another time, I could do little more than let my jaw drop open in shock at her admission. I cleared my throat, forcing myself to meet her eyes so that I wouldn't look vulnerable. "Then you-you want this?" I whispered, unable to get my voice to go any higher.

Ivy placed a hesitant hand on my hip as her eyebrows knitted. "Is that what you were upset about? Because you thought I didn't want this?"

I shrugged a shoulder, resisting the urge to fold my arms across my chest. Not that I could with how Ivy was so close to me.

"Rachel, I want this," Ivy told me, her gaze unwavering as she looked deeply into my eyes.

"But you're with Glenn," I found myself saying.

"I am," Ivy allowed, somewhat more subdued. "And I'll…deal with that."

"Are you going to break up with him?" I asked bluntly.

"Are we going to be together?" Ivy countered.

The pounding of my heart beneath my breast was unreal as I stared up at her. This was my chance to finally, and likely the last one I would ever get. "I want to be with you, Ivy," I murmured.

Ivy inhaled deeply, drawing her lips into her mouth. Her eyes began to shine with tears as she released a shuddery breath. She pitched forward to hug me tightly, her arms winding around me.

I squeezed my eyes shut and twined my arms around her waist, holding her against me as relief flooded through me. "I love you, Ivy."

She sighed against me at the quiet declaration, and turned to nuzzle my ear. "Say it again," she whispered.

I moaned unconsciously at the warmth of her breath on my ear and low tone her voice had taken on. "I love you," I told her again.

"I love you, too," Ivy breathed. Her lips ghosted along my ear and cheek, not quite kissing, just mapping out my skin. I licked my lips, feeling them tingle at the urge to kiss her. I turned my head, and Ivy's breath hitched at the proximity of our lips.

My gaze dropped to naturally pouty, pink lips as my need increased. "I want to kiss you," I told her.

Ivy stared at my lips for a long moment before her shoulders drooped with a sigh. "I can't."

I whimpered without meaning to as my eyebrows furrowed together. "Why not?"

"I want to," Ivy said. "I want to do that and so much more," she husked as she stared at me through her eyelashes. "But I think that I should at least break it off with Glenn first."

Though we had just discussed him moments prior, I had forgotten about Glenn. I slumped back against the wall with a long sigh. "Ivy…"

"I know," she whispered, lips brushing against my cheek that was meant to be placating, but only made me want to kiss her all the more. "But I don't want to cheat. Not on him, and not on you, either."

She was noble. Almost too noble, I noted. But that was ultimately one of the things I loved about her.

Sensing my discontent, Ivy placed a kiss against my temple. "Don't be upset," she mumbled.

"I'm not." I fidgeted in her arms. "I'm just…" I trailed off, not wanting to finish that sentence when it wasn't going to go anywhere.

"I know. _Trust_ me, I know," Ivy said. "I spent years dealing with that particular feeling."

"I guess it's my turn to know what that feels like, huh?" I joked lamely.

Ivy hugged me closer. "Don't do that. If I wasn't with Glenn then we would be doing everything you're comfortable with right now."

I shivered, flipping through my mind like it was a photo album as I imagined all the things I was ready for. I wanted to kiss her, run my fingers through her hair, kiss down to her jaw, her neck. I wanted to feel Ivy, soft and warm in my hands, and flushed as heat coursed through me when, for the very first time, I imagined her naked, waiting for my hands to touch her.

Ivy breathed in deeply and buried her face into my neck with a moan, tightening her hold around me. "You have got to get it together, Rachel."

"It's your fault," I accused, trying to take deep breaths to calm myself. I turned to kiss the top of her head, the only place I was really allowed to kiss her because if I got to close to her lips I would probably try to slide into home. "Do you see Glenn today?" I wondered abruptly.

Her frame shook in my arms with a silent laugh. "Yes, I do," Ivy said warmly, amusement lilting her voice.

"Then can you…you know—then?" I didn't want to sound too, but truthfully, I was. I really, really was.

She nodded with a sigh, and though I didn't have her ability to scent emotions, I could tell her mood immediately sobered up. "I'll definitely have to have a talk with him."

It had never occurred to me that Ivy may actually like Glenn. I rubbed up and down her back as my eyes clenched shut at what I was about to ask. "Do you-do you love him, Ivy?"

"I care about him," she admitted, lifting her head enough to speak right against my ear. I gave a start to quickly reply, and she cut in. "But I _love_ you. I never stopped, Rachel."

There was so much sincerity in her eyes that it melted me right on the spot. I leaned forward and lightly bumped my forehead against hers. "I love you, too, Ivy."

"And if I wasn't with Glenn, I would show you just how much I love you," she husked, pressing her body tightly against mine.

I could feel flutters in the pit of my stomach as I moaned, feeling Ivy everywhere. But it wasn't nearly, and it wouldn't be until she had had the chance to break up with Glenn.

"Tinks titties, don't you two know there are children here!"

Ivy growled lowly, pulling back and slinking away, hips swaying sensually for my benefit. "Bite me, bug."

"Not on your life, Tamwood!"

She walked over to the stove and twisted the cap, turning it back on. I hadn't even realized it was off.

I rolled my eyes. Vampires. Now I was even hungrier…and I wasn't even sure it was entirely for food.

Jenks flew further into the kitchen once the coast was clear. Ivy posted up in her chair at the table on the other side of the kitchen as Jenks gaze darted between the two of us.

He smirked, fluttering to me as a safer bet than antagonizing Ivy would be right now. Though I was a little upset at him for interrupting, I was glad to see him alive and in one piece after Ivy had threatened to kill him last night.

"So, how are things?" he said in a sickeningly sweet, mocking voice as he settled on the countertop. I grabbed a spatula and flipped my now half cooked egg, cutting him a glance.

"Everything's fine," I declared succinctly, not willing to give more while Ivy and I were still trying to more or less find our way in the dark.

"Getting a little Ivy lovin', hmm?" he asked, and I swatted at him.

He took to the air with a laugh that sounded like wind chimes, and Ivy stood from her seat.

Her gave was sizzling as it landed on me, and I swallowed thickly. "I think I'm going to head out now," she said, voice flat and neutral now that there was someone else in the room.

I nodded, hoping that heading out meant talking to Glenn. "When will you be home?" I couldn't help but ask.

I saw a smile touch her lips as she grabbed her bag from beside her chair and hoisted it along her shoulder. "Four or five hours—give or take."

"Okay, umm, have a good run?" I wanted to kiss her, badly, instead of spouting off some lame goodbye like the one I just did.

Ivy stared at me for a long moment. "I will."

I wanted to mount her.

She walked out of the kitchen with a, "See you later, Rachel," and I was suddenly left alone with Jenks.

Before he could start in on a million questions, I turned to him. "Is Wayde awake?"

He shrugged. "I haven't seen him at all this morning."

I shifted three eggs from the pain to a plate and took them over to the table.

"Oh, Rach?" Jenks called from behind me.

I straightened, walking over to the cabinets to grab a cup, avoiding his gaze. "Yeah?"

Jenks was quiet for a moment, and I turned towards him to find him sitting on the counter. "Congratulations," was all he said.

My face split into a small smile. "Thanks, Jenks."

"But for Tinks sake, keep it in the bedroom!"


	11. Chapter 11

**Title: **Hindsight, With a Sixty Percent Chance of About-face

**Pairing: **Rachel Morgan/Ivy Tamwood

**Rating: **PG-13

**Disclaimer: **I do not own these characters. Just having a little fun.

**Summary: **Ever since Ivy had told her she was going to move on, Rachel has been feeling a little out of sorts. But it was just a saying; Ivy wasn't going anywhere. Except, it wasn't, and she was. 

* * *

><p>To say that I wanted Ivy had become an understatement at this point. I was missing her badly and she was only at work, doing what she had done every for the past three years, but now for some reason I was embarrassingly feeling like a clingy high school girl. Though, I knew the reason. The reason was because I had finally stopped turning a blind eye to what had been growing stronger and stronger over the past few years: my love for Ivy.<p>

It was now more than a friendly love. I had begun to crave her, and for that reason, I missed her. I haven't even had the chance to kiss her yet, and I was already having a hard time concentrating on anything, thoughts of kissing her consuming me.

Sighing, I shucked up the window to allow winter air into the house, and Jenks buzzed away in annoyance, flying to the table on the other side. I was feeling antsy, hot, to be honest. Ivy had been gone for over four hours and she was all I could think about.

"Tinks' panties, Rach, it's freezing out there!" Jenks yelled from across the room.

I sighed again, rubbing the tense muscles at the back of my neck. "Sorry, Jenks. I'm just hot."

"More like hot and bothered," he shot back with a snicker. The perv.

He was right, though, and I could do little more than roll my eyes as Wayde snickered from over by the refrigerator. "Is this how it's going to be like from now on, Rachel?" he asked. "You zoning out every now and then while thinking about Ivy?"

Stiffening, my eyes narrowed at the teasing smirk on his face. I chose not to retort, turning back to the counter where my empty splat guns were, waiting to be filled. After all, Wayde had helped me through my muddled confusion about my feelings for Ivy. He got to live. For now.

"You're just getting here," Jenks began from somewhere behind me. "When Rachel has a new _lover_—" he emphasized the word in a sarcastically sweet voice, "she goes all in. She'll be a walking horndog around here from now on!"

They both cackled loudly behind me in amusement, and I spun around to glower at the two of them in mortification. "_Jenks_!" I shouted. "Once again, my personal life isn't water cooler conversation!"

He winced, his ears far too sensitive for the volume I was speaking at. Good. Serves him right.

"Oh, c'mon, Rach, give the guy something," he cajoled. "Wayde hasn't gotten laid in—how long's it been, Wayde?"

"Oh, ha-ha, very funny," Wayde replied dryly.

They began exchanging barbs back and forth, and with a huff, I turned back to the counters. Men.

I picked up a splat gun and got to work, trying unsuccessfully to push Ivy into the back of my mind as I worked, filling up my splat guns as the boys argued behind me.

Suddenly, my stomached coiled in tension when I felt it, the change in air pressure in the church.

Ivy was home.

I quickly spun around, and Jenks took one look at me and rolled his eyes. He stood from the table and took flight, whistling ear piercingly loud. "All right, kids, pack it up and head to the belfry. Stat!"

Loud pixy groans of protest could be heard all around me as all of Jenks' children followed his orders, scurrying through the air. It was kind of unnerving how they could be anywhere at any given time.

Wayde stuffed his sandwich halfway into his mouth, grabbed his bottle of Gatorade and walked out of the kitchen, tossing a wink at me on his way out. I suspected he still harbored some kind of crush on me that was only amplified by the fact that I may be potentially getting it on with Ivy in the future. I rolled my eyes.

Picking up on the faint scuffing of Ivy's boots, the hair on the back of my neck stood on end as she appeared by the doorway, tilting her head and leaning against it. Her face was impassive as she stared at me, no doubt gauging my emotions rather than asking. Probably because she knew I was less truthful with my words than I was with my physiological responses.

A smile curled my lips as she continued to hover cautiously by the door. "Come here, Ivy," I said softly, eager to see her after spending all day with Jenks and Wayde making fun of me for missing her.

She grinned, deviously, and pushed off the doorway to saunter over towards me. As soon as she was within reach my arms were curling around her waist to draw her closer. My breath shuddered out of me at the soft feel of her body pressing against mine. I was still getting used to this, getting used to the fact that everything she did affected me so deeply. I kept telling myself not to think, but it was all I could do. Something about being around Ivy made me want to stop and think now that I had come to grips with the fact that I was in love with her. It was probably because _she_ had always been the one in my life to tell me to think before speaking and acting. Now I was listening, sort of.

I cleared my throat, trying to keep from sounding callous as I asked, "Were you able to do it?"

Her shoulders heaved with a sigh as she nodded, resting her chin on my shoulder. Her arms were wrapped around me just as tightly and I was near delirious as thoughts of throwing caution to the wind and kissing her invaded my mind. But, no. Now was not the time. Now was the time to get information before moving forward and taking care of Ivy if she needed me to in case this was too emotional.

"How did it go?"

Ivy pulled back, face full of bemusement as she stared down at me. "Relatively okay," was her initial standard vague-Ivy reply. She then followed up with, "He said he wasn't surprised, per se. That once I had told him you expressed desires of sharing blood he kind of saw it coming," she continued, and I nodded with a wince, feeling like kind of an ass because apparently everyone had known but me. "But he wasn't happy about it either."

Her words were solemn, and I dragged my hands up the soft muscles of her back to knead at her shoulder blades. "Are you okay?" I whispered, pressing my fingertips into her soft skin. I smiled when she sighed and relaxed against me. Ivy liked physical affection, and it was a sure fire way to calm her down most of the time. _Check_.

She brought a hand up to tuck an unruly lock of red hair behind my ear as she nodded. "Yeah," she sighed. "I'll just have to give him time, I suppose."

"And he doesn't—" I stopped short, licking my lips as long fingers caressing the shell of my ear became distracting. But I soldiered on, temporarily forcing myself to ignore Ivy's soft touch because I needed to get this out. "He doesn't hate us, right?" I asked quietly. I didn't have many friends, and I considered Glenn one of them. Though it was unfair to expect him to still be my friend after I kind of stole his girlfriend, I still didn't want to lose him.

"He doesn't," Ivy assured. "He said that since he saw it coming he's kind of been preparing for it." Her fingers traced from my earlobe to my cheek and she molded her warm hands around them, holding my face in her hands. I trembled as Ivy's eyes darkened. "But he's always known how I feel about you. And he said that he was fully prepared to step aside should you ever feel the same way."

My chest constricted both from sympathy for Glenn and the crushing love Ivy and I had for each other. "I do feel the same way," I whispered.

Ivy's lips quirked upwards into a smile. "I know." Her thumb brushed just under my eye to catch a tear I didn't even know I had cried. "I can't believe I get to touch you this way," she breathed in awe.

And just like that the door was officially shut on our previous conversation, it seemed, as Ivy and I drifted closer towards each other. Her eyes bore deeply into mine as her fingers trailed along my jawline and down my neck. A soft sound lifted from my throat as her hand journeyed toward the back of my neck to play with the wisps of hair there. She leaned in closer, and my lips parted as my gaze dropped down to hers, plump and pouty, begging for me like my own were begging for hers.

Her forehead rested against mine as my fingers tightened in the back of her shirt under her leather jacket. For the life of me I still didn't know how this was going to go, how I was going to adjust with being with a woman. But my want for Ivy outweighed my insecurities and I stood there, feeling heat simmer just under my flushing skin, through my tightly coiled muscles, encase my bones until my entire body felt like it was aching for Ivy to kiss me.

Her nose slid along mine and I stifled a whimper at how close yet far she was. She was teasing, teasing us both; she had to be. Otherwise, why wait? I felt the long, nimble fingers of her other hand begin to knead my tense shoulders, and right then and there I knew she knew what she was doing to me.

"Ivy," I whispered, voice thick and tinged with desperation, and she sighed, pulling back to land pitch black eyes on mine.

"Are you sure, Rachel?" she rasped. Her lower lips trembled as her eyes began to glisten. "Please just make sure—"

"I'm sure." I gripped her shirt tighter and pulled her impossibly closer until her breasts were brushing against mine. I struggled to keep my eyes open as electric jolts shot straight between my legs.

Ivy inhaled deeply and shuddered against me, jaw clenching as she stared directly at me. "You're sure."

I nodded hurriedly, licking my lips. Whole seconds ticked by, admittedly not that many, but Ivy still hadn't moved, so I took matters into my own hands. I rose up on the tips of my toes, one hand snaking up to cup the side of her face, and I kissed her fully.

Her bottom jaw became unhinged with a gasp, and I smiled as I pressed our lips together tighter. Once awareness hit her, Ivy's grip on the back of my neck tightened. She tilted her head while holding mine in place and soft lips slid across mine until I felt heat pulse through me. Her lips were _so_ _soft_ against mine, demanding yet yielding to my own lips as I gave as good as I got, exchanging hot opened mouth kisses like they were going out of style.

I moaned as Ivy plied my lips apart, licking at my bottom one as I panted against her. I opened my mouth just wide enough and her tongue, slippery and agile, slid past my lips. My fingers tightened to dig into her lower back as her tongue curled to stroke along the roof of my mouth, and my knees weakened. A faint groan registered moments later and it was only then that I realized it was Ivy.

She was enjoying this; I could tell by the way her hips began to press into mine, pinning me back against the counter. My hands rose higher to twist my fingers into dark silky strands as I pulled her face closer, starved for more, starved for _her_. I just _needed_ her closer, always closer.

Our lips parted and Ivy panted against my mouth as our foreheads rested together. Her breathing was heavy in a way that I had never heard it before. It was deep and desperate as her fingers curled around my waist, anchoring me.

I felt consumed by heat and arousal at the sure way she had me pinned to the counter with no escape, her hands holding me in place as I brushed kisses along her jawline. Her skin was so soft that I felt the need to be gentle with her, sucking tenderly on the underside of her jaw as Ivy moaned. The soft exhalation of my name falling from her lips completely did me in and my hips jerked into hers. _I was doing this_, I realized. _I was kissing Ivy_.

Ivy's grip on my waist tightened as I kissed a burning trail down to her sensitive neck undeterred by the thoughts. The opposite, actually, they spurred me on to explore more of Ivy. My lips puckered to place a kiss against her long throat, a tingling sensation fanning out along my body at the thought of kissing such an intimate part of her. Before I knew it my teeth were grazing her neck and her hand was winding in my hair, a growl leaving her throat and settling between my thighs as she yanked me back up into a kiss.

My body wanted more of her, I realized as I squirmed. _I_ wanted more of her, _all_ of her. A harsh breath pushed past my lips before I flicked my tongue out boldly against her bottom lip. Ivy groaned and sagged against me as her mouth opened and I slipped inside.

Her mouth was scorching, threatening to burn and I only tried to dig deeper inside of her for more. I ran my tongue along her sharp teeth and Ivy shivered against me as I teased around it. I could feel my nipples hardening in my excitement, brushing roughly against my bra as Ivy's fingers on my waist flexed. I whimpered at the feel of them and the tightness of my jeans teasing against me. I clenched my thighs together. I wanted Ivy to touch me, badly, and everywhere. Every part of me wanted her to claim it. Blindly, I reached down towards her hand and clasped my hand over it. I felt Ivy tense against me and continued to kiss her to calm her down. I wasn't pushing her away; I was pulling her closer. Our joined hands traveled up my ribs and my breath shuddered out of me at the first feel of Ivy's long fingers on the underside of my breast. I dragged our hands higher until she cupping the entirety of it in her palm.

Ivy pulled away with a gasp, staring down at her hand on my breast in awe as if she couldn't believe it was actually happening.

My hand held hers surely against me, and I was pretty sure she could feel my heartbeat thundering beneath my breast as well as hear it.

Ivy licked her lips provocatively, then looked up at me with widened black eyes. "Rachel—"

"Yours," I said simply, voice thick with arousal. I needed her to stop second guessing herself. Everything she wanted she could have, and I needed her to know that. "This is yours, Ivy," I continued, pressing her hand more firmly against my breast. I whimpered and her lips parted in sympathetic pleasure. "All of me is. Please take it."

I would have probably sounded desperate to anyone who wasn't Ivy, but I didn't care. And I knew Ivy appreciated the fact that I was finally ready for everything.

She straightened immediately and slowly pulled her hand away. My jaw dropped in shock, but she leaned down to place a placating kiss against my cheek, nuzzling me as she whispered in my ear, "I think it's time we take this to the bedroom before we give that perv Jenks a show."

A swirl of different feelings sifted through me. Amusement at her statement, mortification at the thought of Jenks walking in, and…arousal, thick and heavy as lead, falling into the pit of my stomach at the thought of us doing enough in the bedroom to constitute a show. With a thick swallow, I nodded, placing a kiss against her jaw before biting her.

Ivy growled softly at the gesture. "We're going to yours."

She pulled back and grabbed my hand, and we were in my room before I could even say _I'm horny_.

I closed the door and locked it behind me without thought, turning around to see Ivy grip the hem of her shirt. Taut creamy skin teased my vision before Ivy pulled her shirt back down. My eyes snapped up to hers in confusion, and she smiled, sharp fangs making me shiver. "Last chance," she whispered.

My only response was to walk over to her. I grabbed the hem of her shirt, missing what I had just seen earlier, and lifted it up, sliding my fingers underneath. I was ready. Fuck, I was so ready as my fingers grazed over her abs. Her body was deliciously warm to the touch and I wanted more than anything to crawl inside of her. I walked my fingers higher until Ivy's shirt was bunched up along her sternum. My hungry gaze ran over her soft pale skin, up to her breast heaving tantalizingly in a black lace bra, then up to Ivy's face, her lips parted, panting in air as her sinfully black eyes stared back at me.

Slowly, she lifted her arms above her head as a lopsided smirk played across her lips. "I don't usually do this," Ivy rasped.

Unable to help myself, I surged forward to capture her lips in a kiss. "Do what?" I asked against her bottom lip before sucking it into my mouth until she moaned.

"I would have made this special," Ivy continued. "I would have taken you out on a date, bought you flowers if I knew this was happening. But fuck, Rachel, I can't—"

I leaned forward to kiss her again in understanding, to let her know it was okay. She wanted to make this special because _we_ were special in her eyes. But truthfully, Ivy didn't need to buy me dinner to get me to put out. Not anymore and not ever again.

I lifted the shirt above her head and tossed it to the floor. "I love you, Ivy, and you love me," I told her. "That's enough."

Her lips quirked a little as she stood topless in the middle of my room looking svelte and sexy in only a bra and leather pants.

Shaking my head in awe at having this beautiful woman in my room, I pulled my shirt of and was met with her lips the second it was over my head. It landed with a thump over the floor I assumed as all of my senses dulled, the only one remaining being my sense of touch as Ivy's long fingers trekked up my back towards the clasp of my bra.

Her hesitancy was gone as she flicked the clasp undone with one finger and I moaned as her prowess in bed that I had heard about for years began to present itself.

Our clothes melted away and the next thing I knew Ivy was hovering over me, love shining in her eyes as she stared down at me. I heard her ask and I nodded hurriedly, clenching around her fingers as they entered me for the first time. She groaned my name as I shuddered around her, and I couldn't help but think that this was home. 

* * *

><p>I moaned softly as consciousness tickled my brain awake. The first thing I registered was a dull ache through my muscles that left me feeling content as memories from last flooded back to me. I felt the slight weight of Ivy's arm wrapped around me and sighed contentedly, turning around to see her.<p>

I had fantasized about this.

But it didn't compare to the real thing.

Ivy looked radiant. Her eyelashes rested on pale cheeks as she breathed evenly through her nose. She looked to be the most at peace than I had ever seen her and my heart swelled at the sight. Her arm was tight around me, holding me close in her vulnerable state. I couldn't help it; I had to touch her, so I reached out and traced her thin eyebrows with my index finger. Now that I had the liberty to touch her, which had admittedly only been denied to me by my own self, I couldn't help but want to touch Ivy everywhere. And I had done so last night. A flush crept over me as I remembered how long we had gone at it. Hours. Ivy had amazing stamina, and I wasn't so bad myself, but I knew I would tire out before she would. And I had. After fingering her for what was probably the third or fourth time, I had to tap out. It amused Ivy to no end how exhausted I was as she scooped me in her arms and I fell asleep with my head on her chest.

I wanted to be perfect. I wanted to learn her, because I had never been with a woman before and I wanted to please her. I had learned that Ivy was a little tricky, but I suspected all women were. It took more than simply touching her to simply please her. I had to appeal to her body as well as her mind, and when I did…to feel her crumble apart below me was unreal. To hear her whisper _my_ name so reverently as she orgasmed was something that I wanted to hear from the rest of my life.

I traced her upper lip with care, remembering all the ways it had brought me pleasure last night. Ivy was…agile. She had looked like a panther as she hovered over me, her trim form thrusting into me as forcefully as I demanded and as gently as I begged for.

And the first time she nestled between my legs and placed her lips against mine—

I gave a start when I felt even teeth close in around my thumb. Coming back to the present, I saw I watched Ivy's eyes flutter open as she smirked at me with sleep-cloudy eyes. I smiled.

"How long have you been awake?" I asked, suddenly feeling like a creep for ogling Ivy in her sleep.

"Few minutes," she rasped. "Around the time you were tracing my cheekbone."

I blushed in embarrassment at having been caught and averted my eyes to the minimal space between us. Ivy was naked, the thin sheet around us threatening to expose the hardening nipple I could see poking through. I was nude, as well, and relished the feel of our legs rubbing together when either of us moved.

Ivy tucked her fingers under my chin and lifted it until I was looking her in the eye. They were a warm brown on a beautiful Thursday afternoon. "No regrets?" she asked softly.

I shook my head. "None." My gaze turned critical as her eyed her. "What about you, though?"

A lone eyebrow rose along her forehead. Damn, I wish I could do that. "Surely, you're joking."

"I'm not," I whispered. I wanted to make her happy. And of course on some level I knew that I did, but, "Glenn, he was a good guy. He was good for you, stable."

"Rachel," Ivy sighed.

"I'm just saying…you took a risk on me, you know?" I licked my bottom lip nervously. I wasn't this girl. I wasn't insecure in my means to make my partner happy. But this was _Ivy_. She had wanted me for years and I hated to think that I wasn't good enough, or that I would disappoint her. I had spent years making both of us wait, puttering her through so much pain, and all I wanted no was to make her happy.

Ivy's eyes rounded to softness once she realized through the near panic levels of my hushed voice that I was serious. Her thumb brushed along my jawline as she cupped the side of my neck. Her mouth quirked into a grin. "You are a risk," she teased, and I rolled my eyes. Her voice dipped into a rumbling purr as she murmured, "A risk that I've been waiting _years_ to take."

I felt a responsive tightening in the pit of my stomach as I licked my lips. "No regrets, then?"

"My only regret is that it took you so long," Ivy responded lazily.

I smiled self-depreciatingly as I watched stretch back on the bed like a jungle cat, the sheet finally slipping away to expose rock hard dusky nipples to the room. My tongue dragged along my lower lip as I considered whether or not we had time for another round. "Yeah, well, I'm a little slow sometimes."

I leaned down to envelope Ivy's nipple with my mouth, and relished in the way she groaned and grappled for my hair.

Her voice was little more than a breath as she admitted, "You're not too quick on the uptake." With a huff, I bit the nipple in my mouth and twisted the other one until she writhed beneath me. "Fuck," Ivy breathed. "But when you learn, you learn." 

* * *

><p>I graciously accepted the tall cup of coffee Ivy walked over to me with a toothy smile, already wondering when we would be able to get out of here and go home. I just wanted to lounge around all day with her and do…more adult things that our new relationship called for. "Thank you."<p>

It was interesting when I realized that outside of the bedroom, not much changed. Over the years personal space had gradually diminished between us until we did nothing but hover over one another when we were in proximity and when Ivy wasn't so hungry that her instincts threatened to ravish my neck. We were still practically attached at the hip now as Ivy stood in front of me with minimal space between us. "You're welcome," she murmured.

She had the silliest, most in love grin on her face and it was so new and amazing to see Ivy this way. I wanted to touch her. It had been a near constant mantra for over twenty-four hours now and I doubted that it would ever end. I reached out to grab her hand when I caught Glenn stepping into the room from my peripheral. I turned to look at him, a deer in lights expression on my face, and Ivy did the same once she saw my attention divert.

He hesitated, gave a small wave, and continued on into the room without a glance back. Awkward.

"So, that went well," I chirped sarcastically.

Ivy reached forward and grabbed my hand, giving it a small squeeze. "Just give him some time."

I sighed, knowing it was the best thing I could do for him but wishing everything was different. I didn't want to lose his friendship, and I didn't mean to break his heart because Ivy chose me, but I loved her.

She gave my hand one more squeeze and leaned down to brush petal soft lips against my cheek. "I'll be back, okay?"

I nodded, frowning once her back was turned and she walked away to help the crime scene. I was once again relegated to waiting on the outskirts because everyone feared I would screw something up. Whatever. We all knew who was really going to be the one to solve this case. It would be me, Ivy, and Jenks, as always.

Speaking of Jenks—

"Rach, I found a sugar cube!"

I darted back in surprise as Jenks wings worked twice as fast in his sugar high. I sighed. He was going to be a piece of work today.

"Hey, Jenks?" I prompted. "Why don't you put the sugar down and search the premises."

"Already did," he chirped. "Twice. Got everything. Though, I should probably check a third time because these fairy fart agents couldn't find evidence if you gave them a map."

He was speaking a mile a minute and my ears began to hurt as his voice rose higher and higher. My vision focused past him, however, when I saw Ivy squat down with a baggie to retrieve some evidence. Her body was amazing, more than now that I had gotten the chance to actually see her naked.

"Are you going to spend the whole time ogling Ivy like always, or are you gonna do some work?" Jenks asked.

I gritted my teeth and shot him a glare. "I did _not_ always ogle Ivy," I defended.

He waved me off and took another lick of his sugar cube. "Whatever. You're boring me, Rach. I'm gonna check around again. See ya!"

He was gone before I could even say goodbye, and I shook my head good naturedly at the thought of how pissed off Ivy was going to be on the car ride home with him.

With both Ivy and Jenks busy, I found myself venturing towards a lonely chair in a corner of the room away from everyone where I could still ogle Ivy. She had since straightened, long legs splayed slightly apart in a show of dominance in the crowded room full of people.

I saw Nina walk into the room and immediately rolled my eyes. It was the undead vampire inside of her that caused her to smoothly glide across the room and saddle up beside me. I turned to Ivy to already find her eyes on me, her back straightened painfully as her eyes narrowed.

I smiled and started to give the kiss kiss gesture, but hesitated, not wanting Ivy to get the wrong idea. I settled for a disarming smile to let her know that I was okay.

Her gaze was on us for a long moment until Glenn grabbed her elbow to get her to look at a piece of evidence.

A surge of irrational jealousy wounded through me before I stomped it down. Ivy and I were together, and there was no need for that. She loved me and I loved her.

I cocked my head to the side to stare at Nina and distract myself. "You're late," I said, teasing the undead vamp whom I had come to respect after the in depth conversation about Ivy I had had with him.

Nina smiled toothily, eyes sparkling as they swayed from Ivy to me. "I was busy."

"I bet," I replied sarcastically.

"Why, Ms. Morgan," Nina spoke with missing a beat, "you look positively _radiant_ today. Any special reason?"

I knew Ivy could hear us. I could practically see her ears perk up like a puppy as she turned just to side eye us.

My lips trembled with a small smile as I stared at her. "A special reason," I mumbled, almost shyly. "She's very special."

When I saw Ivy's lips lift into a smile before she turned away, I knew she heard me.


End file.
